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2012/03/30

The Kinky Report: March 16, 2011 - March 15, 2012

Introduction

On March 16, 2009, I began keeping a diary of sorts in order to capture information regarding my sexual exploits.  I published the statistics I was able to glean from that recorded data in March of 2010 and again, in March of 2011. 

The following is a list of statistics from this year’s (3/16/11 – 3/15/12) data.  The diary is fairly accurate as I did a good job of consistently recording my exploits.  I believe I managed to record every sexual encounter I had during that time period. 

It should be noted that this was the second year a “bath house” was open in Minneapolis.  I put that in quotes because it really isn’t an official business; rather it’s something of a best kept secret/underground sensation.  I’ve visited seven times during its first year of operation, compared to six times this year.  During those six visits I engaged in some form of sexual play 106 times – which accounts for 29% of my total sexual encounters during this time period.  The most sex I had during this time period also occurred at the bath house (23). 

I’m thinking it might be important to compare this year’s stats to last year’s, so the data will be presented in the following format: This Year’s Stat / Last Year’s Stat / First Year’s Stat

Stats
Closed for Business: 17/ 34 / 40
Stood Up: 7/ 15 / 8
No, Didn’t Find Anything or Not in the Mood: 196 / 161 / 157
Total Days of No Sexual Activity:   213 (58% of Year) 195 (53% of Year / 205 (56% of Year)
Number of Days I Did Look and Find: 153 (2.41 men per day, 42% of Year) / 157 (2.47 Men per Day, 43% of Year) / 160 (1.67 Men per Day, 44% of Year)
Total Number of Times I Participated in Sexual Activity: 368 /388 / 267 (1% decrease)  

Activity
No Cum: Number of Times Guys Failed or Chose Not to Cum: 157 / 99/ 38 (59% increase)
Flip Flop: 7 / 4 / 6 (75% increase)
Me Top: 17 / 12 / 16 (42% increase)
Oral on Me: 81 / 76 / 18 (7% increase)
Oral:  187 / 181 / 148 (3% increase)
Anal: 29 / 25 / 4 (16% increase)
Oral and Anal: 113 / 137 / 92 (18% decrease)
Kiss: 99 / 125 / 65 (21% decrease)
Rim (me or them): 34 / 56 / 26 (39% decrease)
J/O: 37 / 46 / 19 (20% decrease)
Menage a trios: 23 / 28 /12 (18% decrease)
Group Activity: 8 / 15 / 5 (47 % decrease)
Blindfolded: 10 / 33 / 35 (70% decrease)

Location
Total Outdoors: 170 (46% of all sexual activity for year) / 162 (42% of all sexual activity for year) / 160 (60% of all sexual activity for year) (5% increase)
Bog/Wirth: 13 /27 / 50 (52% decrease)
Prairie: 35 /81 / 74 (57% decrease)
St Paul: 0 / 0 / 3 (remained the same as the previous year)
East River Road: 115 / 54 / 33 (113% increase)

Car: 34 / 29 / 14 (At the listed parks) (17% increase)

Total Indoors: 198 (54% of all sexual activity for the year) / 226 (58% of all sexual activity for the year) / 107 (40% of all sexual activity for the year) (12% decrease)
Rehab House: 4 /48 / 33 (92% decrease)
My Place: 8 / 13 / 11 (38% decrease)
Their Place: 40 / 54 / 47 (26% decrease)
Hotel: 3 / 14 / 4 (79% decrease)
Public (Garage, Restroom, Sauna, Gym, or Their Office): 130 / 77 / 12 (69% increase)
Garage: 15 / 20 (25% decrease)


The Experience
Exceptional: 46 (13% of experiences) / 46 (12% of experiences) /28 (10.5% of experiences)
Good: 104 (28% of experiences) / 99 (26% of experiences) / 74 (27.5% of experiences)
Average: 165 (45% of experiences) / 182 (47% of experiences) / 108 (40.5% of experiences)
Bad: 51 (14% of experiences) / 61 (16% of experiences) / 57 (21% of experiences)
Repeat: 133 (36% of experiences) / 115 (30% of experiences) / 122 (46% of experiences)

Race
White: 314 (85%) / 335 (86%) / 225 (84%)
Black: 15 (4%) / 18 (5%) / 20 (7.5%)
Asian: 17 (5%) / 5 (1%) / 2 (1%)
East Indian: 2 (1%) / 6 (2%) / 6 (2%)
Hispanic: 18 (5%) / 24 (6%) / 14 (5%)

Size
Over 8: 58 (15 of which were over 9”) 916%) / 62 (16%) / 54 (20%)
7 to 8: 136 37%) / 114 (29%) / 99 (37%)
Under 7: 122 (7-6) and 49 (< 6) (46%) / 144 (7 to 6) and 68 (< 6) (55%) / 114 (43%)

Age
20’s:  30 (8%) / 53 (14%) / 35 (13%)
30’s: 75 (20%) / 98 (25%) / 74 (28%)
40’s:  141 (38%) / 167 (43%) / 102 (38%)
50’s:  103 (28%) / 60 (15%) / 53 (20%)
60’s: 14 (4%) / 10 (3%) / 3 (1%)

Physical Condition
Excellent Shape: 65 (18%) / 80 (21%) / N/A
Good Shape: 151 (41%) / 148 (38%) / 89 (33%) – (Means: This year 228 were in Good or Excellent Shape, which accounts for 59% of all experiences)
Okay Shape: 114 (31%) / 123 (32%) / 124 (46%)
Bad Shape: 33 (9%) / 37 (9%) / 54 (20%)
Long Time (over an hour): 32 / 29 / N/A
Handsome: 78 (21%) / 98 (25%) / 64 (24%)
Bald: 35 (10%) / 41 (11%) / 42 (16%)

Definition of Terms

Closed for Business: 17
Due to a minor surgery that took place during the year, dental work or illness, I was physically unable to participate in sexual activity on these days.  These may have also been days when I had a cold and abstained.   

Stood Up: 7
These are occasions when I had plans with an individual and that individual failed to show.  This would not necessarily sour my mood and curtail activities for that day.

No, Didn’t Find Anything or Not in the Mood:  196
Data failed to distinguish between these two reasons for lack of sexual activity.

Flip Flop: 7
Describes occasions when an individual would perform anal sex as a top with me in the role of bottom and then I would perform anal sex as a top with them in the role of bottom.

Me Top: 17
Times I served as the only top during the encounter, describing occasions when I would perform anal sex as a top with them in the role of bottom.

Oral on Me: 81
Occasions when I received oral sex from another – this may, or may not have been done in conjunction with other types of sexual activity.

Oral: 187
Occasions when the only activity engaged in, other than kissing, fondling or frottage, was me performing oral sex on an individual

Anal: 29
Occasions when the only activity engaged in was me being topped by (receiving anal sex or bottoming) an individual (no kissing, fondling or frottage).

Oral and Anal: 113
Occasions when I performed oral sex on and individual and received anal sex from the same individual.

Kiss: 99
Occasions when kissing was involved.

Rim (me or them): 34
Occasions when rimming was involved and I performed it on them and/or they performed it on me.

J/O: 37
Occasions when masturbation (mutual or solo) – this may, or may not have been done in conjunction with other types of sexual activity.

Menage a trios: 23
Occasions when two individuals and myself participated in sexual activities with one another at the same time.

Group Activity: 8
Occasions when 3 or more individuals and myself participated in sexual activities with one another at the same time.
Least number present (includes self) to qualify as Group Activity: 4. 

Blindfolded: 10
Occasions when I wore a blindfold during sexual activity.  Typical scenario featured me wearing blindfold before other(s) arrived, until other(s) departed.

Total Outdoors: 170
Number of sexual encounters that took place outside, typically in wooded areas

Bog/Wirth: 13, Prairie: 35, St Paul: 0, East River Road: 115
Parks/Wooded Areas where sexual activity took place

Car: 34 (At the listed parks)
This number in included in the number of total outdoor sexual encounters and is accounted for as they related to the park/wooded area where initial contact and subsequent agreement to engage in sexual activity took place.

Total Indoors: 198
Number of sexual encounters that took place indoors (Private House or Public Building)

Rehab House: 4
Occasions when an individual(s) would come to a house I was rehabbing for the purposes of sexual activity

Hotel: 3
Scenario where I traveled to their (out of town visitor) hotel room, here in the Twin Cities

Public (Garage, Restroom, Sauna, Gym, or Their Office): 145 (15 of which were in a garage)
Occasions when sex took place in a non-traditional location other than outdoors

The Experience (Exceptional: 46, Good: 104, Average: 165, Bad: 51)
These ratings are defined by my personal likes and dislikes as relating to sexual activity and/or the physical attributes or behavior of the individual(s) involved.  Ratings are of a purely subjective nature.

Repeat: 133
Occasions when I engaged in sexual activity with a given individual on more than one occasion. It includes individuals with whom I engaged in sexual activity with prior to the beginning of the defined year, but had occasion to have engage in sexual activity during the defined year. 

Size (Over 8: 58, 7 to 8: 136, 7-6: 122, Under 6: 49)
As it relates to the length of an individuals fully erect penis in units of inches. Measurements based on personal visual determination or claims of individual as stated in emails and then verified via personal visual determination. (Note: First year there was not a category labeled “Under 6”, First and Second years there was not a category labeled “Over 9”.)

Age (20’s:  30, 30’s:  75, 40’s:  141, 50’s:  103, 60’s: 14)
In terms of years, based on personal visual determination or claims of individual as stated in emails or during conversation and then verified via personal visual determination.

Physical Condition:
As it relates to an individual’s body in terms of muscle tone, percentage of body fat and a visual determination of physical health.  Determination subjective in nature. (Note: The first year there was not a category labeled “Excellent”.)

Excellent Shape: 65
Individual displayed one or more of the following attributes: Very Muscular Physique, Washboard Abs.  A build that could be described as Extremely Athletic or Very Muscular.

Good Shape: 151
Individual displayed one or more of the following attributes: Muscular Physique, Toned Physique, Low % of Body Fat, Flat Abdomen.  A Build that could be described as: Muscular, Toned, Trim, Worked-Out, Somewhat Worked-Out, Buff, Swimmers, Thin, Wiry, Athletic, Jock, Slim, Twink

Okay Shape: 114
Individual displayed one or more of the following attributes: A Somewhat Muscular Physique, A Somewhat Toned Physique, Average to Somewhat More Than Average % of Body Fat, A Slightly Protruding Belly (Hard). A Build that could be described as: Beefy, Bear, Average,

Bad Shape: 33
Individual displayed one or more of the following attributes: A Lack of Muscular Tone, More Than Average to Excessive % of Body Fat, A Distended Belly (Soft). A Build that could be described as: Flabby, Large, Big, Fat, Obese, Soft, Unkempt

Long Time: 32
Sexual encounters that lasted over an hour in length

Handsome: 78
As it relates to the construction and contours of an individuals face, determination subjective in nature.

Bald: 35
Includes individuals with shaved, closely buzzed or naturally bald heads. Does not include individuals who are balding or have an “eagles nest” hair style. 

Observations / Conclusions

Not in the mood more often.  Could be due to my disenchantment with the general activity.  As I look at my year, month-to-month – Summer months were the busiest, but I definitely curtailed my activities in the last four months of the year, with two of those months registering only 10 sexual encounters.  Why do I think that is an improvement?  Because at my peak (in October) I registered 53.  In fact: an additional three months posted over 40 encounters in each month.  So… 10?  Yeah, that’s an improvement.  Is it a good number?  Well, that’s relative, isn’t it.

I was hoping the total number would be significantly lower this year.  I suspect it will be next year, given my recent… apathy?  Though summer is coming…

Increase in me topping / flip/flopping?  Definitely the bareback thing.  It’s becoming more the norm, more accepted.

Decrease in Rimming: I just am not that into it.  I will let dudes rim me, but I am not eating ass the way I used to.  Every time I think about doing it, I realize the inherent risks are not worth it. 

Decrease in Group Activity:  I think I might be over it, you know, like a fantasy realized. Did that, been there…

Decrease in Blindfold: This is a healthy sign.  I think the risks associated with many of my behaviors are more of a concern – which means; maybe I actually give a shit about my safety.  That’s a sign that my self-esteem is improving, right?  Hmmm.

The parks situation: it is rather dire.  I definitely switched over to ERR this Summer, where I sunned a lot, and fucked on occasion.  I avoided St. Paul completely again this year.  And from what I recently learned from a fellow cruising enthusiast, it is probably for the best, as they have ripped out and destroyed much of the flora there.  Same goes for the Prairie.  This year they raped that place, tearing out tons of underbrush.  I think there is a special place in hell for those evil homophobes over at the Parks and Wrecks Department.   The Bog/Wirth Pkwy was hit very hard by last summer’s tornado, but much of the underbrush has been stripped away and they are actually manicuring the whole hill area for those stupid cross country skiers.  That leaves ERR (thus the increase), which, I suspect, will become less of an outlet for sexual expression.  Currently there is this meathead cop and a bunch of vigilante dog walkers/concerned citizens harassing cruisers. Fuck them.  But at least they haven’t resorted to ripping out the vegetation yet. Yet.  Should be interesting this summer.  Prediction:  These numbers will drop significantly next year.

133 Repeats – 235 Newbies: This pretty much in-line with previous years.  You would think I would run out of new dudes, but, hey – that’s what vacations are for, am I right?  Vacations provide that potent combination of being fresh meat in an untapped market.

Race: Asian was up.  Hmmm.  Not that significant.  I still like them all… although I must confess Black dudes make my knees weak.  Why so many white dudes?  I live in Minnesota.  Think about it.  Blech.

Ummm… that’s it.  Nothing really changed this year, except for the drop off in activity during the last four months of the year. 

I do think that is a trend that will continue, perhaps not in the summer, but I also don’t think we will be seeing numbers in the mid to high forties or fifties at all.  Just a hunch.  The drop-off could also be contributed to the death of my dog, Beau.  I do know that the rather manic phases of activity during this time period were directly related to that.

Maybe I’m depressed.  My physician has thought so pretty much since the day she met me – five years ago.  I have been considering discontinuing this blog.  I certainly have better things to do.  But I do enjoy writing… and this blog forces me to exercise my brain and use those skills.  

There definitely has been some kind of shift.  Inside.  And I don’t see myself returning to my hedonistic, reckless ways.  For example, I doubt I will ever visit the warehouse again.  Last time I  went, it made me feel desperate, not sexy; it felt weary, not fun.  And I’ve lost patience for those phone apps and hook-up sites and the people the populate them.  Having recently gone to the Eagle a number of times (4), I know that the bar scene is not for me either. 

I don’t hunger for something more.

I hunger for less.

I hunger for quality. 

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