Acquired Tastes, Chapter XIV: Fur

There is indeed something very animal about fur, but in this case, let’s focus on body hair, as found on the human male. There’s something very potent, masculine, and erotic about a chest full of hair or musky armpits, and beauty to be found in a nice, pert, furry ass – for some. I am frequently amazed by the lengths some will go to eradicate all traces of hair from their body (save their head). Shaving can be a kink of sorts and the appreciation of smooth men is certainly a broadcast preference as evidenced in many a profile on on-line hook-up sites. But just as frequently, I see those who desire the hirsute. Usually this means they have a bear fetish, but not necessarily. Some prefer a hot otter (a dude who is thin and hairy). So, let’s dive in, have fun, and lose ourselves momentarily in a thick, curly chest full, armpit full or ass full of…

Fur

Scope of Activity:

The appreciation of hair – pubic, armpit, chest, legs, ass, back – as found on the male body.

Does not include: facial hair or hair on top of the head.

The Official Line:

Trichophilia - this refers to those with a fetish for the hair on top of a person’s head – and usually a yen for those with long locks. So it doesn’t really work for the scope, but I thought I’d mention it anyway.

I was surprised that there was not a term for those who dig body hair, but maybe I just didn’t look hard enough. If you know of one, please let me know.

Psychological Aspects:

Growing up, when boys reach that point in puberty where they start to grow some body hair, it is a big deal – and a sign of becoming a man. (Oh, if only the sprouting of body hair made men of boys, wouldn’t the world be a much better place? But in reality, it takes a lot more than just a handful of pubes to make someone a man. Which helps explain the large number of hairy, 40-something, self-involved little boys in the world). Becoming a man is equated to masculinity and being masculine is typically something that is a desirable achievement, as we tend to measure ourselves according to the standards and values achieved by others of our ilk. The hallmarks of masculinity are many, and almost all related to the body’s development post puberty: muscle, body hair, facial hair, as well as the adoption of certain social demeanors – ruggedness, athleticism, machismo, etc. In a way, it’s like putting on a costume or hiding within an established, stock character. One of the easiest entries into the world of masculinity is to develop body hair. Yep, wear the right uniform and you’ll gain entry to the club – it can be that easy.

Of course, we’re talking about the kind of assessments that are made in a glance in the locker room – and, as such, we all understand that these assessments are shallow, short-sighted and adolescent in nature. It’s just another version of “who’s got the biggest weenie.”

So am I insinuating that smooth men are not masculine? No, not at all. As I mentioned, there are other factors that go into measuring masculinity, even in the shallowest of terms. However, there is something boyish about smooth men – as discussed in a previous Acquired Taste entry that dealt with Twinks. It then stands to reason that body hair would tend to lend one an air of maturity – i.e. indicating that one is more man than boy. Again, this goes back to the time of puberty and the cliché of Little Johnny worrying that he has no fur and is therefore not becoming a man. It is perhaps in this environment – the world of adolescence - that a persons associations to and appreciations of male body hair are formed.

Side Note: There was a study done where 14% of the women polled appreciated and were sexually attracted to men with body hair. I’m thinking that percentage is much higher in the gay population – closer to 40 to 50%.

My Experience:

As is typical of me, as I appreciate most types/activities on some level, I find fur fun. I have no preference for fur, but if a dude is furry, it may actually serve as a trigger for me and entice me into their bed. I do find it sexy. I do consider it masculine. But then, it all depends on the dude. A hairy, dumpy man is not any likelier to get me to hop in the sack than a smooth, dumpy man. That said, I’ve been bedded by a number of dumpy men of both varieties. Eh, what can I say… I’m an equal opportunity enjoyer!

I guess our fathers are the first place we notice fur – but, to be honest, a discussion about that leaves me a bit queasy, so we’ll leave it at that – our fathers are the first place we notice fur. Beyond that, for me, it was my high school gym teacher. He was a compact, balding dude with a barrel chest and his entire body was covered in light, wispy fur. Everywhere. Except his head. In retrospect, the man exuded an air of masculinity that bordered on the comical, but to a budding adolescent, enamored of the most rudimentary of male icons – comic book superheroes, Sears catalog underwear models – such a blatant display was immediately noted, observed and appreciated. I think he had a thing for former Vikings coach Bud Grant, because, come to think of it, he aped a lot of his mannerisms.

My years as a football manager (water boy / towel boy), gave me ample opportunities to check out the fur of others in various stages of development – from the pubescent to the mature. So, yeah, I guess I’ve seen it all – and at an early age. I think that’s why I’m so open to so many different types – having been exposed to a large field at a young age, I have never felt the need to narrow it, nor, then, did I have the opportunity to fixate on any type of body.

Looking back at all the serious loves of my life – only two were furry. This would tend to lead one to the conclusion that I prefer smoother men, but that’s not the case. Serious love encompasses a lot of factors – personality, values, socio-economic status, compatibility in the sack, etc. – fur, if on the list at all, is not high up.

I do have this yen for black fur – as in the color black. Especially on a nice butt. Or all over – as in ape-man. There’s something super sexy about it – fur all over a man’s body. That’s where that thing about potency comes in. I find it animal and then it becomes physical. There’s also something ethnic about it… or blue collar. It’s earthy and appeals to all my senses.

Before exploring the various areas and types of body hair, I think it important to explore a certain decade when body hair was routinely flaunted and subsequently worshipped – yes, my favorite dirty little decade – the 70’s – when pretty much everything came flying out of the closet and was thrust into the limelight. Maybe it was a response to all those button-down types that worked in Washington D.C. at the time, but opening up one’s shirt and bearing your chest hair was a pretty common practice during most of this time period. It was everywhere on T.V. Thank you Magnum P.I., Starsky and Hutch, Three’s Company and the like. Pop music also had its fair share of chest bearing – Thank you Freddy Mercury, The Village People, Gino Vanilli and the like. And let’s not forget the monster of all fur-fests – Al Pacino’s gay romp “Cruising” – not only lending legitimacy and exposure to the likes of fisting, leather, and sex in the bushes, but also tons of lovely Italian Stallion fur. Yes, thank you on all, for you all helped put the GRRRRRR in fur! Of course, just like the rise and subsequent (supposed) death of disco, the backlash with fur was almost simultaneous – and those gold chain wearing Brillo pads of man hair were ridiculed as often as they were celebrated. But it was a glorious time – yes, a wild, untamed, untrimmed time.

Sigh.

Okay, let’s break this mother down…

Pubes – my appreciation has vacillated. I used to love them, but not in my mouth or stuck between my teeth. Then I got older and discovered that your dick looks younger and appears a bit larger if you trim or shave it. Is it an optical illusion? Of course, as you get older, illusions take on a new meaning – kindness, and we become a lot more tolerant of such foolishness. There is also another, much more practical reason to shave – crabs. Yes, you can still get crabs even if you shave, but you are less likely to. Also, if there are no trees in the forest, then the little dickens have no place to hide and become much easier to detect. So, currently I shave. That said, I still appreciate a nicely trimmed bush on a dude, however, my days of liking guys who allow their thatches to go native are over. If I want to floss my teeth, I’ll stick to dental floss, thank you.

Armpits – There’s a previous Acquired Tastes entry that covers this topic pretty well. I think the appreciation of fur in this instance has a lot to do with one’s sense of smell and an appreciation for body odors. Although, licking that particular fur can be quite animalistic and spur one onto to even more intense physical contact. Personally, I like a dude who has pit hair, but keeps it somewhat trim. And thanks to those awful Gay Guys for the Straight Guys – trimming everything is now an accepted part of male grooming – except in parts of Iowa, Mississippi, Alabama and Georgia.

Chest – I love resting my head on a furry chest. I find comfort there – masculine, assured comfort. It’s kind of a bummer when it comes to nip play (again – fur in the teeth), and older dudes have this tendency to not pay attention to just how much of a jungle they got going on there – those wild hairs that poke out and are longer than any of the others? – not attractive. But those are my only misgivings. I actually find that blanket of chest fur thing to be really sexy – again, it borders on ape-man territory, but depending on who it’s attached to, I can be not only cool with that, but find it a turn on.

Ass – So, let’s dive right in here (so to speak) and be blunt– on the buns, hot. Around the anus? Can be a messy, annoying nuisance. That’s why I frequently shave that area now. It saves time and toilet paper in the long run. Yeah, I know, nobody wants to talk about this except those creepy Charmin Bears, but keeping it clean is a social must. Avoid skid marks forever! Shave today! Not having to deal with hair down there? Kind of a no-brainer. Still, there are those that like a hairy hole – and to those, I say, have at it. Having been unpleasantly surprised too many times, I like ‘em sans follicles. But back to that on the buns thing – nothing sexier than dark fur perfectly splayed over a hot bubble butt. That’s a sight that I find truly mouth watering. And now- everybody go – Ewwwwwwww. Oh, grow up. Fucking butt munchers.

Legs – leg fur tends to be really different than any other fur – it catches the light and can appear super sexy. Guys have commented favorably on mine numerous times. That said, I have no intention of ever shaving my legs. Unless I take up drag. And since my fear of drag queens is on the same level as my fear of clowns, that’s a circus I won’t ever be tempted to join. Leg fur on others? Can be sexy. Depends on the legs and who they’re attached to.

Back Hair – Tah-dah! The most derided and least appreciated of all the body furs. Do I got it? Oh, yeah. Would I rather not have it? Oh, yeah. I’d love for someone to shave my back, but those willing to do it that I have stumbled upon thus far? Not the kind of dudes I am likely to allow to help me with anything. The trade off is just too high a price. Maybe if it wasn’t sexual, then I could allow it, or if the dude was hot. But let’s face it; a hot dude has better things to do than shave my fucking back. My back hair is still blonde, but I am old enough now that some follicles have begun to develop a personality of their own (see my comments regarding chest hair on the mature male above). Seriously – I think back hair is a deal breaker for some dudes, namely dudes who have never had to deal with it. Of course, the opposite can also be true – since it’s something they themselves have never experienced it can therefore hold a kind of fascination for some – but they’re a rare flower in a garden of back-hair hating petunias.

I’ve never tried Nair or those types of foam products. Do they work? I’ve heard they can be kind of caustic and lead to skin irritation and burns – so, in an effort to not invite trouble into my life; I have yet to try them. The idea of going to someone to have my back waxed – eeehhhhh. I think I would be majorly stoic about it, but I am kind of unpredictable when it comes to pain. Sometimes I can suck it up – as in, I pulled a muscle in my calf and I’m gonna run on it anyway, and sometimes I will scream bloody murder – as in, when having bone marrow removed from your hip without sufficient anesthesia (that particular physician and I are no longer on speaking terms).

That said, I have never had an issue with the hair on another dude’s back. It can be a turn on… especially in Daddy/Son scenarios, or if you want to pretend you’re being fucked by an ugly cop. Or the butcher. Or a wife beater wearing, NYC tenement-dweller type.

My Conclusion:

Okay, not my conclusion – but one, none the less:

(He) asks me why
I'm just a hairy guy
I'm hairy noon and night
Hair that's a fright
I'm hairy high and low
Don't ask me why
Don't know
It's not for lack of bread
Like the Grateful Dead
Darling

Hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair
Flow it, show it
Long as God can grow it
My hair

I want it long, straight, curly, fuzzy
Snaggy, shaggy, ratty, matty
Oily, greasy, fleecy
Shining, gleaming, streaming
Flaxen, waxen
Knotted, polka-dotted
Twisted, beaded, braided
Powdered, flowered, and confettied
Bangled, tangled, spangled, and spaghettied!

Hair – lyrics by James Rado & Gerome Ragni

Next Taste: Camping (Outdoors – With a Tent) (Bring marshmallows!)