Acquired Tastes LXIII: Gay Pulp Fiction, Part 10 - Late-Hour Library

Acquired Tastes LXIII: Gay Pulp Fiction

Part 10 - Late-Hour Library

Today, we finish up examining the remaining gay-oriented titles that were part of Greenleaf Classic's Late-Hour Library imprint. To learn a bit of this imprint's history, visit here.  Once again, you'll find the names of the authors and illustrators familiar, provided you've read any of my previous posts on this topic. 

Let's dive in and look at this imprint's final offerings, while having a little fun at their expense.

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You remember Gene North, writer of Good-bye, Gay Love...

Skid Row Sweetie

Author: Gene North

Cover Art: Robert Bonfils

"Rod was every wino's..."

Ha, ha, ha, ha... remember back when people who were homeless were called 'Winos', because, you know... they were alcoholics? And people like Dick Wilson would be in a skit on television where they played the town souse? Wasn't chronic alcoholism hilarious? And now, apparently, it is also a means for romance. Or is Rod just a run of the mill co-dependent in need of a fix, so he searches back alleys to find a man he can prop up and keep afloat with his love? Or maybe Rod just has a thing for back alley hobo sex? Yes, this cover raises way more questions than it answers... including: exactly who is that big tittied blonde sweeping the kitchen?

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Learn more about Dick Dale here, and here.

The Price of Pansies

Author: Dick Dale

Cover Art: Robert Bonfils

"He was a gay flower child!"

A gay flower child? Just what kind of beatnik butt burglar are we talkin' about here? And that's not a protest sign... it's a sales sign. Oh! He must own a flower shop. Whaaaaat? A gay florist? Why, never has there been such a thing. And in this day and age? Poor little pansy. He got his shop and had big dreams of creating the most unique and original floral arrangements ever seen. Instead? He has to spend most of his days putting together rote FTD bouquets, as seen in the catalog, just to pay the rent.   

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This is one of those pseudo-psychological / sociological 'studies' that the imprint would begin to concentrate on. Note: the 'Ph.D.' at the end of the author's name. By the way, Dr. Douglas H. Gamlin is really plain old Donald H. Gilmore. But he has plenty of other doctorates... well, fake ones, under different pseudonyms. I guess he served as Late-Hour Libraries resident quack.

Homosexual Incest

Author: Douglas H. Gamlin, Ph.D.

Cover Art: Unknown

"A shocking study of love that was doubly taboo."

Doc be laying down some heavy shit here.  Just get a load of that blurb next to the tagline... "In this bold, unashamed work, Dr. Douglas Gamlin examines the darkest realm of deviation, peopled by shadow figures who lead duel existences. Outwardly they are creatures of abject apathy, for only the depravity of incestuous homosexuality can bring the spark of awareness to their inverted minds." Hmm... someone got a thesaurus for Christmas!  I keep reading it. I know those are all words, but... for gawd's sake somebody please tell me what he's talking about? He writes like a 1940's hygiene film.

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We came across Lance Lester (George Davies) twice before - here and here. I wonder if Disney ever tried to option this one?

Lights Out, Little Hustler

Author: Lance Lester

Cover Art: Robert Bonfils

"Bill's road was paved with gay intentions."

Is Bill auditioning for the lead role in Sweet Charity? Cuz is looks like he's doing a little song and dance number there. Hey, Mr. Producer... he's talking to you, Sir! He don't need a lot. Only what he got. Plus a little cocaine and some real good pot! Tell me... what exactly are... 'gay intentions'?  Sounds like something spouted by a lawyer about to invoke the gay panic defense. Hey... wait a minute! That's no Broadway Producer! That's Vice President Mike Pence sitting on that bed. Ahhhh... So this is what happens when 'Mother' is out of the room!

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Chris Davidson (Christian Davies) yet again. He's everywhere. Here, here and here.

The Gay Gods

Author: Chris Davidson

Cover Art: Robert Bonfils

Scrubba Dub! Looks like they are trying to wash that man right into his hair. But hard to say which of our fellas is gonna 'drop the soap'. My money is on the dish in the skirt. I met a 'Gay God' once. I worshiped the hell out of his false idol. We bathed beneath a waterfall in Hawaii, too. It was a magical moment. Followed by a couple of rounds of antibiotics. Yes. The tropics. All that moist heat. You never know what you'll be bringing back as a souvenir!

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Mr. Fancy Panties

Author: Dick Dale

Cover Art: Ed Smith

"He was the dainty darling of the dorm!"

Gives a whole new meaning to the idea of 'going on a panty raid'. Why stop at stealing them when you can wear them? I'm sure there's a reasonable explanation. You know boys, out on their own for the first time, never doing laundry. The day comes when they cannot bear to turn those tighty whities inside out one more time? What to do. Go commando? Naw... why should they? They have all those panties stolen from the girl's dorm last night. By Jove! I do believe I've cracked the code on this one... now we know why panty raids really exist. Know what? This is the one I think I want to bring to my next sleepover with the girls. We can all take turns reading a chapter while sipping our cock-tales. You game?

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Ah, Tony Calvano (Thomas J. Ramirez), the writer who dabbled in 'gay'. We've seen his work before, here, and here.  

Roll Call in Sodom

Author: Tony Calvano

Cover Art: Ed Smith

"He called the fellows; she called the girls."

Just... mark... me... present. People sure are tan in Sodom - or California, as we commonly call it. I wonder if they made it a competition to see who could bed the most same sex partners. Or did they each get to invite only one 'very special guest star'? And then, when it was all over - did they stay together, as a couple? And what did the winner actually win? This kind of arrangement must exist in real life, yes? Who could we ask? Is Scotty Bowers still alive?

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This is part of the aftermath of The Man from C.A.M.P. Series. Don Holliday (Victor J. Banis) ended that series after nine novels, but the franchise was so established and successful that spin-off projects, like this astrology guide, kept the brand alive. The others included a gay self-help book and a cook book.

The C.A.M.P. Guide to Astrology

Authors: Lady Agatha and Jackie Holmes

As told to Don Holliday

Cover Art: Unknown

Do you believe in astrology? I don't. I think it's an interesting belief system, you know, like Catholicism and Buddhism and all those other 'isms'. But in the end, like all belief systems not based on fact - as in, how the world really works -  it's just another way of escaping having to take responsibility for one's own actions and behavior. "Sorry, boss. I didn't mean to plant that stapler in your skull. It's just that my moon is in Uranus and and then, you ARE such an anus, so..."

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That does it for Late-Hour Library.  Next up: the Sundown Reader imprint, with a host of new 'authors'. Did you like what you see? Did I get something wrong? Let me know in the comments section. 

Age of Aquarius from Hair

Sunday Diva / Three From the Hip: Bette Midler

Sunday Diva

Three From the Hip

Bette Midler

Bette is another of the three main pillars in my personal big gay church.

Divine? To say the least. 

And the lady earned it. The hard way.

She embraced our community long before others dared. 

Watching her career over the years? Not for the faint of heart. She was blessed, then a mess, and what came next? Anyone's guess. 

I loved Jinxed. But it certainly lived up to it's name when it came to her career. 

Disney to the rescue! And then,voila... a diva reborn. She was sadder but wiser... and a bit bitter. 

Difficult to work with? The stories are legend. But then, so is she: a legend.

And legends get what legends want.

The gospel according to her?

Well, here are three from the hip, dropping from her lips.

The topic: Acceptance and Belonging

“Find your light; They can't love you if they can't see you”

“I didn't belong as a kid, and that always bothered me. If only I'd known that one day my differentness would be an asset, then my early life would have been much easier.”

"If you can accept your differentness and learn to love it and encourage it, then you can be someone wonderful."

The Glory of Love - Bette Midler

In My Life - Bette Midler

My One True Friend - Bette Midler

Sunday Diva / Three From the Hip: Cher

Sunday Diva 

Three From the Hip 

Cher

Today's Sunday Diva is one of the three main divinities in my personal big gay church: Cher. 

Can I get an amen?

Legendary, caustic, iconic, uncensored... the woman has never met a challenge she couldn't bear, a man she wouldn't snare, or a sequin she shouldn't wear.

The gospel according to her? 

Well, here are three from the hip, dropping from her lips. 

The topic? Men!

"The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing - and then marry him."

"Husbands are like fires - they go out when they're left unattended."

"Men should be like Kleenex, soft, strong and disposable."

Sunday Diva is a new feature here at Wonderland Burlesque. Each Sunday we will hear the gospel according to some of my favorite divas.

Woman's World - Cher

Walking In Memphis - Cher

Believe - Cher

Wonderland Burlesque's Turdscooter of the Week: Rick Wiles

Wonderland Burlesque's 

Turdscooter of the Week

Rick Wiles

“Who you gonna call?”

That is the burning question this week, according to one Rick Wiles.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, as long as there are ‘men of god’ and self-righteous conservatives, so shall there be a “Turdscooter of the Week”.  And what would right-wing nut jobs do if it were not for the bilious pockets of shelter afforded them by American radio?

This week’s winner?  

Trunews radio host Rick Wiles, who seems to believe that when old dubba-u, dubba-u three breaks out, God won’t be saving the neck of America like he did last time during dubba-u dubba-u two.

Who knows, maybe it’s because God doesn’t care for sequels of a sequel? 

But, no, Mr. Wiles insists it’s because of the gays.  In his way of thinking, granting gays equal rights and allowing them to marry has doomed this country.

But, never fear… there’s hope, according to Wiles and his vision of this inevitable future:

“Worse case scenario is the submarines come up on the west coast and the east coast and just obliterate us while we sleep at night.”

Wait.  Is that a ‘worse’ case or a ‘best’?  Hmmm.  Apples, oranges?

Whatever the case, Wiles is certain that those pesky ruskies will soon be aiming their nuclear warheads at our golden shores (you know, as soon as the ruble stabilizes and, oh, I don’t know, Sony Pictures’ ‘The Interview’ wins an Oscar for best motion picture).

“We are on the edge of World War III,” claims Wiles. “And this time the United States of America does not have divine protection because we've become a nation of homosexuals and atheists and lesbians and God-haters.”

Did I forget to mention the atheists, lesbians and God-haters? 

Well, at least the gays are in good company. 

Mr. Wiles rants on:

“What are you going to do America?  If he (God) left and the Russian nukes show up? If the Russian submarines show up and you find out God left? Who you gonna call on, all you atheists? All you homosexuals?  All you God-haters?  Is your ‘gay god’ going to come and save you?”

Who you gonna call, indeed!

Well, not “gay god”.  That’s for sure. 

He still can't throw a baseball worth shit.

But Gay Jesus, on the other hand...