TMI Questions: Time, Time, Time… - Classic Edition

Time, time time, see what’s become of me

While I looked around

For my possibilities

I was so hard please…

- ‘ Hazy Shade of Winter’ written by Paul Simon

Sean must be taking a break, which I totally understand.  But I need blog fodder, so I am going to be dipping into the TMI archives for some classic questions, which is something I have always hoped to do.

This week it’s all about time. 

My current schedule is something I am still trying to adapt to.  Fitting it all in has been something of a challenge while some people have been very vocal about not getting enough quality time with yours truly.

Not the boyfriend, though.

Hey, I’ve got my priorities straight… so to speak.

TMI QUESTIONS:

Questions designed to reveal Too Much Information

Link: http://tmiquestions.blogspot.com/

TMI Questions: Time, Time, Time…

Classic Edition

How many hours in a good night's sleep and what's good?

The going rate is supposed to be eight hours, but I typically get by on five and a half to six. 

That’s too little.  My body is constantly telling me I require more.  I love to nap, so I’d like to believe that makes up for some of it, but then I am also aware of the studies that say you can’t make up for lost sleep.  

And sometimes, lately, there isn’t a whole lot of sleeping getting done during those naps.  But that’s the upside of having a boyfriend who enjoys naps as much as I do.

As for the quality of sleep getting done during those six hours each night?  It’s not good. 

I frequently find myself ‘skimming’ the surface of sleep without ever actually falling asleep.  This can be refreshing, but I find it doesn’t keep my candle lit as long.  Also, I suffer from night terrors (childhood trauma).  My dreams tend to be very vivid, in color, and detailed.  There is plenty of emotion involved, the story is well-connected with events flowing logically from one thing to another - and these stories?  They frequently go very, very wrong which has me waking and screaming and ending up totally freaked out.

I could take something to sleep (and have), but virtually being knocked unconscious is hard to recover from and I feel it for days after. 

So, skimming seems to work, for now.  It’s like daydreaming with your eyes shut.   

How many hours a day do you spend just on social media?

Currently, not much.  And really, my only means of social media has been blogging and reading other blogs.  I have boycotted Facebook due to my lack of interest in reconnecting with or revisiting my past.  Gave up all the gay sites, too, due to lack of need/desire. 

I guess people aren’t my thing.

Excluding porn and social media, how many hours a day do you spend on the internet and what are you doing?

Excluding porn?  Are you implying there are other things?

Work-related activities include: purchasing things, research, reading articles, training, and communication.

Personal activities include: reading news articles, research, reading blogs, listening to music, and communication.

I am on-line almost constantly when at work, usually reading news articles or researching something and/or listening to music.  So, my work day consists of almost constant internet usage, be it work-related or curiosity.

My after work hours used to be spent this way, as well, with the addition of porn/blogging.  I would sit on the end of my couch all evening.  I would use my laptop as a deflector shield.

But no more. 

I still blog on occasion, but I haven’t had the time I used to in order to read / comment on the writings / posts of others.  That will change.  My alone time will no doubt regain some type of equilibrium once I get my schedule down and the whole discovery / enraptured phase of my current relationship mellows out. 

Not sure when that might be.

Check with me in five years.

I remain hopelessly fascinated.

How do you and how long is your commute to and from work?

Drive, by myself, Monday-Friday

Total time is 15-20 minutes, which is 15-20 minutes too long for the rest of the world, as they have to put up with my manic, aggressive, over-the-top driving style. Fortunately this takes place at 6:00 am, when most people are either opening their eyes or still asleep. 

That said… I am getting better.  I am changing my behaviors.  I’ve come to realize that there is little gained in switching lanes repeatedly.  That getting ahead of that poky driver / school bus / semi / city bus is not going to get me ‘there’ (wherever that may be) any sooner.  That bellowing expletives and giving the heavens the finger isn’t going to help matters much at all. 

Yep.  I’m one of ‘those’ drivers.  And while the above listed behaviors may make me feel better about the situation, I do believe they rob me of a lot of joy.  I now concentrate on singing harmony with whatever little pop gem plays forth from my radio / CD player, rather than share obscene gestures and play ‘press the brake pedal’ with my fellow commuters. 

Still… pointing out the horrid driving habits remains a hobby.

As for my own driving?  Why, naturally, my conduct is above reproach. I (ahem) remain the only safe / good driver on the road.

Naturally.  

On average, how many hours do you work a week?

Hmm.  Define ‘work’.

My job?  It gets a solid 40 plus.  I go in early and leave as soon as possible.  Not out of disinterest or dissatisfaction, but I do have a lot of other things that have to be done.  Also, I work to live, not live to work.  It’s a job.  It gives me money, stability, a nice gym to work out in, and great health insurance among other benefits.

See, I have to spend time with my Mom and Dad every day.  This is on orders from my youngest sister who visits from Madison for a weekend each month.  It makes sense to me and I knew the day was coming.  Of course, she didn’t tell me directly that was what was expected, but I got the message – loud and clear.

Then there are my dogs, the rental properties, my house, etc. 

So I could never be one of those 60 plus hours per week people.  Ugh.  I tried that in L.A. and it made me physically ill.

Though, in light of all my other commitments, I feel I am on-call to work all the time.

Of course, lately…. my priorities are a bit different.

How long does it take you to get ready for work?

Depends on what day of the week it is and how much shaving / buzzing I have to do.

Typically? 15-20 minutes.  On those days when only a few things get shaved 30 minutes.  On those days when I want to trim up everything?  45 to an hour and 15 minutes.

I have gotten really lazy about the shaving / buzzing thing lately.  My BF likes a hairy chest, so I don’t have to do my pecs anymore (though I think they may get a nice trim soon).  Nor does he insist on shaved or buzzed anything.  He’s very easy going (and sexy as hell) and I am following his lead on this.   

A night out?

That’s a good two hours if I am at my home.  Anytime I try to get by with less, I end up running late.

The whole douching thing is part of that picture. 

And if you ever want to be absolutely, 100% sure that your ass will NOT get fucked that night? 

Be sure to douche before going out. 

Works like a charm every time.

Why is that?

How many hours a week do you spend with friends?

My family – they are my friends.  Plus, I have a few (very few) friends that I am not related to.  Average?  14 – 20 hours.  Sometimes more. But not much.

I’m not including the time I am currently spending with my BF.   And he’s a friend, for sure.  Among other things. 

Delicious things.

How many hours do you spend working out?

I typically work out between 60 to 90 minutes.  I used to only work out Monday through Friday, but now I take a spin class on Saturday mornings (75 minutes) and on Sunday mornings the BF and I hit the gym (90 minutes). 

The other day I realized I’d worked out 23 days out of 25 days.  So I made this an ‘opt out’ week and overhauled my regimen again.   Going forward – I will work out six days in a row and no more.  The body requires down time in order to avoid injury.  Which is something, at my age, I can’t afford.

I love my work outs.  I love working out with the BF.  He’s hella smart about this stuff, so it’s like having a personal trainer. 

Plus, shower time is way fun and, typically, after getting some food, a nap figures into the equation.

Delicious things.

On other physical activities?

You mean shoveling snow?  Mowing lawn?  Cleaning house? 

As much time as it takes and not a second more, unless it’s a deep clean or an end of season kind of thing.

I do hike a lot.  Not so much in winter, but, as you know, I love to roam outdoor trails during the rest of the year.  Will that be the case this year?  We’ll see.  

Bonus: 

How long is a good JO session?

As long as it takes for the other person to get off.

I never jerk off alone.  Why would I?  Oh, I’ll work my own stuff, but in-the-flesh inspiration is the way to go. 

What's the shortest and longest amount of time you've spent having sex – to completion?

Shortest: In a mens room, in front of the urinals, in front of others – four to five minutes.  Included butt sex.

Longest:  Four hours plus.  We were both pleasantly high on weed, GGG, and energetic as fuck.  It was like Cirque du So-Gay.  Limbs were flying everywhere.  We flip fucked the whole time.  Our tongues went places I’d never considered before and I had holes plugged I didn’t even know I had.  I came like four times, he came five times.  It was way fun and I completely lost track of the time.

It was an epic fuck.

So, of course…

…we never saw each other again.

 

  

Acquired Tastes, Chapter XIV: Fur

There is indeed something very animal about fur, but in this case, let’s focus on body hair, as found on the human male. There’s something very potent, masculine, and erotic about a chest full of hair or musky armpits, and beauty to be found in a nice, pert, furry ass – for some. I am frequently amazed by the lengths some will go to eradicate all traces of hair from their body (save their head). Shaving can be a kink of sorts and the appreciation of smooth men is certainly a broadcast preference as evidenced in many a profile on on-line hook-up sites. But just as frequently, I see those who desire the hirsute. Usually this means they have a bear fetish, but not necessarily. Some prefer a hot otter (a dude who is thin and hairy). So, let’s dive in, have fun, and lose ourselves momentarily in a thick, curly chest full, armpit full or ass full of…

Fur

Scope of Activity:

The appreciation of hair – pubic, armpit, chest, legs, ass, back – as found on the male body.

Does not include: facial hair or hair on top of the head.

The Official Line:

Trichophilia - this refers to those with a fetish for the hair on top of a person’s head – and usually a yen for those with long locks. So it doesn’t really work for the scope, but I thought I’d mention it anyway.

I was surprised that there was not a term for those who dig body hair, but maybe I just didn’t look hard enough. If you know of one, please let me know.

Psychological Aspects:

Growing up, when boys reach that point in puberty where they start to grow some body hair, it is a big deal – and a sign of becoming a man. (Oh, if only the sprouting of body hair made men of boys, wouldn’t the world be a much better place? But in reality, it takes a lot more than just a handful of pubes to make someone a man. Which helps explain the large number of hairy, 40-something, self-involved little boys in the world). Becoming a man is equated to masculinity and being masculine is typically something that is a desirable achievement, as we tend to measure ourselves according to the standards and values achieved by others of our ilk. The hallmarks of masculinity are many, and almost all related to the body’s development post puberty: muscle, body hair, facial hair, as well as the adoption of certain social demeanors – ruggedness, athleticism, machismo, etc. In a way, it’s like putting on a costume or hiding within an established, stock character. One of the easiest entries into the world of masculinity is to develop body hair. Yep, wear the right uniform and you’ll gain entry to the club – it can be that easy.

Of course, we’re talking about the kind of assessments that are made in a glance in the locker room – and, as such, we all understand that these assessments are shallow, short-sighted and adolescent in nature. It’s just another version of “who’s got the biggest weenie.”

So am I insinuating that smooth men are not masculine? No, not at all. As I mentioned, there are other factors that go into measuring masculinity, even in the shallowest of terms. However, there is something boyish about smooth men – as discussed in a previous Acquired Taste entry that dealt with Twinks. It then stands to reason that body hair would tend to lend one an air of maturity – i.e. indicating that one is more man than boy. Again, this goes back to the time of puberty and the cliché of Little Johnny worrying that he has no fur and is therefore not becoming a man. It is perhaps in this environment – the world of adolescence - that a persons associations to and appreciations of male body hair are formed.

Side Note: There was a study done where 14% of the women polled appreciated and were sexually attracted to men with body hair. I’m thinking that percentage is much higher in the gay population – closer to 40 to 50%.

My Experience:

As is typical of me, as I appreciate most types/activities on some level, I find fur fun. I have no preference for fur, but if a dude is furry, it may actually serve as a trigger for me and entice me into their bed. I do find it sexy. I do consider it masculine. But then, it all depends on the dude. A hairy, dumpy man is not any likelier to get me to hop in the sack than a smooth, dumpy man. That said, I’ve been bedded by a number of dumpy men of both varieties. Eh, what can I say… I’m an equal opportunity enjoyer!

I guess our fathers are the first place we notice fur – but, to be honest, a discussion about that leaves me a bit queasy, so we’ll leave it at that – our fathers are the first place we notice fur. Beyond that, for me, it was my high school gym teacher. He was a compact, balding dude with a barrel chest and his entire body was covered in light, wispy fur. Everywhere. Except his head. In retrospect, the man exuded an air of masculinity that bordered on the comical, but to a budding adolescent, enamored of the most rudimentary of male icons – comic book superheroes, Sears catalog underwear models – such a blatant display was immediately noted, observed and appreciated. I think he had a thing for former Vikings coach Bud Grant, because, come to think of it, he aped a lot of his mannerisms.

My years as a football manager (water boy / towel boy), gave me ample opportunities to check out the fur of others in various stages of development – from the pubescent to the mature. So, yeah, I guess I’ve seen it all – and at an early age. I think that’s why I’m so open to so many different types – having been exposed to a large field at a young age, I have never felt the need to narrow it, nor, then, did I have the opportunity to fixate on any type of body.

Looking back at all the serious loves of my life – only two were furry. This would tend to lead one to the conclusion that I prefer smoother men, but that’s not the case. Serious love encompasses a lot of factors – personality, values, socio-economic status, compatibility in the sack, etc. – fur, if on the list at all, is not high up.

I do have this yen for black fur – as in the color black. Especially on a nice butt. Or all over – as in ape-man. There’s something super sexy about it – fur all over a man’s body. That’s where that thing about potency comes in. I find it animal and then it becomes physical. There’s also something ethnic about it… or blue collar. It’s earthy and appeals to all my senses.

Before exploring the various areas and types of body hair, I think it important to explore a certain decade when body hair was routinely flaunted and subsequently worshipped – yes, my favorite dirty little decade – the 70’s – when pretty much everything came flying out of the closet and was thrust into the limelight. Maybe it was a response to all those button-down types that worked in Washington D.C. at the time, but opening up one’s shirt and bearing your chest hair was a pretty common practice during most of this time period. It was everywhere on T.V. Thank you Magnum P.I., Starsky and Hutch, Three’s Company and the like. Pop music also had its fair share of chest bearing – Thank you Freddy Mercury, The Village People, Gino Vanilli and the like. And let’s not forget the monster of all fur-fests – Al Pacino’s gay romp “Cruising” – not only lending legitimacy and exposure to the likes of fisting, leather, and sex in the bushes, but also tons of lovely Italian Stallion fur. Yes, thank you on all, for you all helped put the GRRRRRR in fur! Of course, just like the rise and subsequent (supposed) death of disco, the backlash with fur was almost simultaneous – and those gold chain wearing Brillo pads of man hair were ridiculed as often as they were celebrated. But it was a glorious time – yes, a wild, untamed, untrimmed time.

Sigh.

Okay, let’s break this mother down…

Pubes – my appreciation has vacillated. I used to love them, but not in my mouth or stuck between my teeth. Then I got older and discovered that your dick looks younger and appears a bit larger if you trim or shave it. Is it an optical illusion? Of course, as you get older, illusions take on a new meaning – kindness, and we become a lot more tolerant of such foolishness. There is also another, much more practical reason to shave – crabs. Yes, you can still get crabs even if you shave, but you are less likely to. Also, if there are no trees in the forest, then the little dickens have no place to hide and become much easier to detect. So, currently I shave. That said, I still appreciate a nicely trimmed bush on a dude, however, my days of liking guys who allow their thatches to go native are over. If I want to floss my teeth, I’ll stick to dental floss, thank you.

Armpits – There’s a previous Acquired Tastes entry that covers this topic pretty well. I think the appreciation of fur in this instance has a lot to do with one’s sense of smell and an appreciation for body odors. Although, licking that particular fur can be quite animalistic and spur one onto to even more intense physical contact. Personally, I like a dude who has pit hair, but keeps it somewhat trim. And thanks to those awful Gay Guys for the Straight Guys – trimming everything is now an accepted part of male grooming – except in parts of Iowa, Mississippi, Alabama and Georgia.

Chest – I love resting my head on a furry chest. I find comfort there – masculine, assured comfort. It’s kind of a bummer when it comes to nip play (again – fur in the teeth), and older dudes have this tendency to not pay attention to just how much of a jungle they got going on there – those wild hairs that poke out and are longer than any of the others? – not attractive. But those are my only misgivings. I actually find that blanket of chest fur thing to be really sexy – again, it borders on ape-man territory, but depending on who it’s attached to, I can be not only cool with that, but find it a turn on.

Ass – So, let’s dive right in here (so to speak) and be blunt– on the buns, hot. Around the anus? Can be a messy, annoying nuisance. That’s why I frequently shave that area now. It saves time and toilet paper in the long run. Yeah, I know, nobody wants to talk about this except those creepy Charmin Bears, but keeping it clean is a social must. Avoid skid marks forever! Shave today! Not having to deal with hair down there? Kind of a no-brainer. Still, there are those that like a hairy hole – and to those, I say, have at it. Having been unpleasantly surprised too many times, I like ‘em sans follicles. But back to that on the buns thing – nothing sexier than dark fur perfectly splayed over a hot bubble butt. That’s a sight that I find truly mouth watering. And now- everybody go – Ewwwwwwww. Oh, grow up. Fucking butt munchers.

Legs – leg fur tends to be really different than any other fur – it catches the light and can appear super sexy. Guys have commented favorably on mine numerous times. That said, I have no intention of ever shaving my legs. Unless I take up drag. And since my fear of drag queens is on the same level as my fear of clowns, that’s a circus I won’t ever be tempted to join. Leg fur on others? Can be sexy. Depends on the legs and who they’re attached to.

Back Hair – Tah-dah! The most derided and least appreciated of all the body furs. Do I got it? Oh, yeah. Would I rather not have it? Oh, yeah. I’d love for someone to shave my back, but those willing to do it that I have stumbled upon thus far? Not the kind of dudes I am likely to allow to help me with anything. The trade off is just too high a price. Maybe if it wasn’t sexual, then I could allow it, or if the dude was hot. But let’s face it; a hot dude has better things to do than shave my fucking back. My back hair is still blonde, but I am old enough now that some follicles have begun to develop a personality of their own (see my comments regarding chest hair on the mature male above). Seriously – I think back hair is a deal breaker for some dudes, namely dudes who have never had to deal with it. Of course, the opposite can also be true – since it’s something they themselves have never experienced it can therefore hold a kind of fascination for some – but they’re a rare flower in a garden of back-hair hating petunias.

I’ve never tried Nair or those types of foam products. Do they work? I’ve heard they can be kind of caustic and lead to skin irritation and burns – so, in an effort to not invite trouble into my life; I have yet to try them. The idea of going to someone to have my back waxed – eeehhhhh. I think I would be majorly stoic about it, but I am kind of unpredictable when it comes to pain. Sometimes I can suck it up – as in, I pulled a muscle in my calf and I’m gonna run on it anyway, and sometimes I will scream bloody murder – as in, when having bone marrow removed from your hip without sufficient anesthesia (that particular physician and I are no longer on speaking terms).

That said, I have never had an issue with the hair on another dude’s back. It can be a turn on… especially in Daddy/Son scenarios, or if you want to pretend you’re being fucked by an ugly cop. Or the butcher. Or a wife beater wearing, NYC tenement-dweller type.

My Conclusion:

Okay, not my conclusion – but one, none the less:

(He) asks me why
I'm just a hairy guy
I'm hairy noon and night
Hair that's a fright
I'm hairy high and low
Don't ask me why
Don't know
It's not for lack of bread
Like the Grateful Dead
Darling

Hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair, hair
Flow it, show it
Long as God can grow it
My hair

I want it long, straight, curly, fuzzy
Snaggy, shaggy, ratty, matty
Oily, greasy, fleecy
Shining, gleaming, streaming
Flaxen, waxen
Knotted, polka-dotted
Twisted, beaded, braided
Powdered, flowered, and confettied
Bangled, tangled, spangled, and spaghettied!

Hair – lyrics by James Rado & Gerome Ragni

Next Taste: Camping (Outdoors – With a Tent) (Bring marshmallows!)