Warning... this is an adult site. If reading or viewing things about what gay men do sexually with one another bothers you - you should not read this blog. This blog is a reflection of my adventures and thoughts. Some are fun, some not so pretty. I won't name names, or kiss and tell... but I will live to tell. And baby, trust me - I am gonna spill it all over your pretty little party dress. Enjoy!
Down The Rabbit Hole merely places a spotlight on something slightly unusual that's caught my interest. With the help of Wikipedia, YouTube, and other sites, I gather information and learn something new.
Today, we take a look at The Mavis's.
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The Mavis's were an Australian rock band formed in Ballarat, Victoria, in 1987. Founding mainstays are Becky Thomas on vocals and keyboards, her brother Matt Thomas on guitar and vocals, and Andrea Vendy on drums. They released three studio albums and enjoyed a great deal of success in the late 1990s. After a farewell tour of Australia, they disbanded in December of 2001.
The group's overall sound has been described as: "ABBA meets ELO" (a bit of a stretch).
In early 1993, they released their first extended play, Spindrift. Cameron Adams of Beat Magazine described it in February of 1993 as: "Recorded live at The Empress – and sounding all the better for it – The Mavis's make pop which is edgy and ace fun. From the rollicking Spinning Top to the very cool Bless My Soul it is a fine EP. Best of all is the opener Juggernaut, all harmony and melody."
A second EP, Poseidon, was released in May of 1994. Jeff Jenkins of In Press Magazine described it thusly: "This is pop that also rocks. It's dreamy, but it also knows when to poke you in the chest. These guys are great." X-Press Magazine's Lucy Morris felt that it "contains six refreshingly exciting, highly addictive, punchy pop songs which should at least earn them the tag of 'a band to look out for'. This is simply one of the best Australian releases for ages. It's the perfect marriage of post punk artiness and classic pop melodies with bucket-loads of energy to boot."
The group signed with Mushroom Records' White Records label in 1995, releasing their debut album, Venus Returning, in May of 1996. A
In April 1998 they released their second studio album, Pink Pills, which reached #12 on the ARIA Albums Chart. The second single from the album, Cry snagged the #13 spot on the ARIA Singles Chart. That same year, at the ARIA Music Awards, the Mavis's received four nominations.
After the album's release, the band toured in support of Kylie Minogue, and later backed Green Day on their Australian tour.
Moving toward the millennium, the group contributed a couple of songs to tribute and soundtrack albums, along with a pair of songs used by Hyundai and Coke for commercials.
Issues with their label delayed the release of their third album, Rapture, which was finally released until March of 2003. The tour to support the album turned into their farewell tour and the group disbanded.
On December 27, 2014, the Mavis's reformed, with original members Beki, Matt and Nik joined by additional musicians, for a one-off show in Melbourne. And in 2018, the band reunited once again to commemorate the 20th anniversary of Pink Pills. The Thomas siblings and Gill performed the album in its entirety for the tour.
Down The Rabbit Hole merely places a spotlight on something slightly unusual that's caught my interest. With the help of Wikipedia, YouTube, and other sites, I gather information and learn something new.
Today, we take a look at Altered Images.
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Altered Images are a Scottish new wave/post-punk band who found success in the early 1980s. Fronted by singer Clare Grogan, the group branched into mainstream pop music, enjoying six UK Top-40 hits and three Top-30 albums from 1981 to 1983. Their hits include Happy Birthday, I Could Be Happy, See Those Eyes, and Don't Talk to Me About Love.
Their debut album, Happy Birthday (1981), was largely produced by Steven Severin of Siouxsie and the Banshees. The title cut peaked on the charts at #2. That same year, they were voted Best New Group at the NME Awards and Most Promising New Act in the 1981 Smash Hits readers poll.
Their second album, Pinky Blue (1982), while reaching the Top-20 on the UK Albums Chart and spinning off three more Top-40 hit singles, was considered something of a disappointment by the UK press. That said, the album's I Could Be Happy proved to be the group's only foray onto the US charts, with the single peaking at #45 on the Billboard Dance Chart.
Their third album, Bite, half of which was produced by Mike Chapman (Blondie), and half by Tony Visconti (David Bowie), included another Top-10 hit, Don't Talk to Me About Love, in the spring of 1983. The album itself made the Top-20 on the album charts in the UK, but sold less than its two predecessors. After touring behind the album, the group broke up.
In 2021, the group got back together to support Human League on tour. This prompted them to record an album of new material, Mascara Streakz, which became a Top-30 album on the UK charts in 2022.
For today's Who Did It Better? entry, we have a song that did much better on the charts the second time around... at least in the UK. But does chart success necessarily translate into a superior version?
Let's find out!
Bye, Bye, Baby (Baby, Goodbye) was written by Bob Crewe and Bob Gaudio, a member of The Four Seasons. The pair is responsible for most of The Four Seasons' songbook and is responsible for co-writing and produced a string of Top 10 singles for the group.
The Four Seasons were the first to record it and it was released as a single in December of 1964. It would eventually appear on their 1965 album, The 4 Seasons Entertain You.
Their version of the song made it to #1 in Canada and #12 on the US Billboard Hot 100 in 1965.
The song is deceptively simple. In actuality (and I will let Wikipedia do the heavy lifting here):
"After a winding seven-bar introduction in D major, featuring Frankie Valli's spoken recitation, the song settles into a triplet-swing beat and thereafter alternates between two keys, F-sharp major (in the chorus) and A major (in the verse and final chorus), bridging the gap with a five-step chromatic pivot-modulation (D-D♯-E-F-F♯ over the line "She's got me and I'm not free")."
Ten years later, The Bay City Rollers sold a million copies and hit #1 on the UK Singles Chart for six weeks starting in March of 1975. It would eventually appear on their album, Once Upon A Star. Their version ended up being the top-selling single that year in the UK. In addition (and this demonstrates just how much the music industry had changed in terms of global reach in ten years) it went to #1 in Australia and Ireland, #6 in South Africa, #7 in Norway,#10 in West Germany, #11 in the Netherlands, #13 in Austria, #15 in Belgium and #32 in New Zealand.
Note: A version by British group The Symbols reached #44 in the UK Singles Chart in 1967. And a version by Hiromi Go hit #9 in Japan in December of 1975.
And that's the whole story.
Now? On to the competition!
The Song: Bye Bye Baby (Baby, Good-bye)
The Competitors: The Four Seasons vs. The Bay City Rollers
Bye Bye Baby (Baby, Good-bye) - The Four Seasons
Bye Bye Baby (Baby, Good-bye) - The Bay City Rollers
The Four Seasons
Dramatic opening. Great harmonies. Warm? It is not. Those ooo's are a little pitchy. Could be the vinyl.
But Frankie Valli... he could tear through a box of cereal and I'd listen. The man's voice simply cuts straight through and sounded great on the radio. The Four Season's songs were fun, but it's his voice which sold all those records, gave the group their focus and made them a cut above the rest.
He's in great form here.
The production work is perfectly period - those drums sound like cardboard boxes. But those ha
The verse is fun. Sassy and swings.
It's a very noisy environment. That's part of its charm. The remastered version does a great job of cleaning it up, but leaves the recording sounding thinner and less lively.
As we go on, the strings get a bit shrill, but they also sort of mirror the piercing tone of Valli's vocals.
It certainly does not wear out its welcome.
Hard not to like. It's such a perfect pop confection.
The Bay City Rollers
Great job on the intro. Notice how far recording technology had come in ten years. This is a much smoother ride.
But then Les takes the lead and.... he's no Frankie Vallie. Adequate... even good, but not the force of nature Valli was on the original.
That said, this is top notch stuff. Polished pop. I think the Rollers were incredibly underrated. Had they been given the opportunity to work with better producers, Jimmy Iovine comes to mind, I think they could have overcome their teenybop roots and become a more credible band.
I don't miss the strings.
The band is tight. Great sound. Great energy. I can see why people responded to this.
I do think The Four Seasons brought a bit more heft and weight to the verses. For some reason this feels rushed. I miss the space in the mix which was used to such great advantage in the original version.
The backing harmonies are spot on.
Is that... a kazoo? What the? Huh.
No. It's a very badly modulated fuzz guitar, I believe. Oh, dear. Who thought this a good idea?
I love what they do at the 2:10 mark. Super fun. Great vocals.
From that moment on, it's like a rugby sing-along.
Very fun.
The Verdict
The Rollers do a great job. It's super fun and tight. I still hold them in the highest of regard.
For this week's Who Did It Better? selection, we have a song which started out as a home demo B-side but has gone on to become one of a certain singer/songwriter's most widely recorded songs - and not always to his liking! Though it only became a huge hit in the UK, it did help win its writer quite a bit of credibility and helped change the musical direction of a certain American diva.
So, hardly a waste of time.
You're My Favorite Waste Of Time was written by Marshall Crenshaw. The song was written in 1979, while he was appearing Off Broadway as John Lennon in the Beatles tribute Beatlemania. Inspired by the Hollies, it features tongue-in-cheek lyrics concerning his wife.
It was one of Crenshaw's first attempts at songwriting and he recorded it first in his NYC apartment studio, playing all the instruments himself. When it first appeared as the B-side to his signature 1982 hit, Someday, Someway, it was credited as being played by The Handsome, Ruthless and Stupid Band, but, nope... that's all him. Given that, the sound on the original version is very much that of a home demo, featuring what one critic dubbed: "a curious tempo and an eerie vocal harmony... a little out of kilter, with distinctive keyboard notes, and a lovely stumbling finish." It's rough, but not without its charms, which is probably why Crenshaw never went into a studio and produced a more polished version.
As is, it can be found on two of his compilation albums: 1998's The 9 Volt Years and 2000's This Is Easy: The Best of Marshall Crenshaw.
1983 found Bette Midler returning to the studio to record her sixth album - her first studio album in four years. She'd been busy launching a film career, appearing in The Rose, the concert film, Divine Madness!, and Jinxed!. Given the commercial disappoint of her prior studio album, 1979's disco-infused Thighs And Whispers, the folks at Atlantic Records were pushing for a change in musical direction. The results? Her arty, stylistically adventuresome No Frills album - an inspired piece of work which, while it did little to alter her commercial fortunes, did alter her musical landscape forever and has since become a fan favorite. With plenty of rock and new wave influences, it was produced by Chuck Plotkin, best known for his work with Bob Dylan and Bruce Springsteen.
Midler’s gave You're My Favorite Waste Of Time it’s major exposure to American audiences. Released as the second single from the album, her version reached #78 on the Billboard Hot 100. You'd think those additional song royalties would have pleased Crenshaw, but upon hearing it, he was rather dismissive, saying: "I guess there must have been something in it that struck her as funny - that appealed to her sense of humor perhaps, whatever that is."
The Bellamy Brothers, who had enjoyed a #1 hit with their very first charting single, 1976's Let Your Love Flow, recorded a version for their 1985 album, Howard and David. It was their tenth studio album. By that point in their career, the duo had been thoroughly embraced by the country music crowd. Released via MCA and Curb Records, the album spun off a trio of #2 Country hits: Old Hippie, Feelin' The Feelin' and Lie To You For Your Love - with the album itself going Top Ten.
Scottish singer Owen Paul’s approach was a much more dance-pop affair. It made the UK top ten in 1986. Released on May 19, 1986 it climbed to the #3 spot in Britain. In addition, it managed to hit #4 in Ireland, #8 in Belgium and the Netherlands, #20 in Austria, #21 in Germany, and #23 in Australia. It helped earn Paul the status of a one-hit wonder, as it would be his only charting hit.
Referring to the Paul's version, Crenshaw said that "a guy in Britain picked up on [Midler's] version of it and had his own smash hit, which still gets played on the radio all the time in Europe." Which is great - because that means larger royalty checks for Crenshaw. But, like Elvis Costello before him, some songwriters aren't always flattered. In an interview at the time, Crenshaw was critical of Paul's version, saying: "I can't listen to even twenty seconds of that record at all."
More to Crenshaw's liking? Ronnie Spector's take on it. In 2003, the former Ronette's lead singer recorded an EP's worth of Crenshaw's songs titled Something’s Gonna Happen. How do we know he approved? Crenshaw himself plays on her version of You're My Favorite Waste Of Time.
Note: in addition, the song has been covered in a variety of styles by numerous other acts including: Matthew Sweet & Susanna Hoff, Freedy Johnston, Johnny Logan, The Drowners, et. al. So, like it or not, Crenshaw has a bit of a time-honored classic; something his bank account most certainly approves of!
And that's the whole story.
Now? On to the competition!
The Song: You're My Favorite Waste Of Time
The Competitors: Crenshaw vs. Midler vs. The Bellamy Brothers vs. Paul vs. Spector
You're My Favorite Waste Of Time -Marshall Crenshaw
You're My Favorite Waste Of Time - Bette Midler
You're My Favorite Waste Of Time - The Bellamy Brothers
You're My Favorite Waste Of Time - Owen Paul
You're My Favorite Waste Of Time - Ronnie Spector
Marshall Crenshaw
The weird beginning is so we know it's a home demo. The drum kick-off is a riot. Sounds like he's hitting a big plastic barrel. Very Mersey Beat. Very D.I.Y. Fun. Crenshaw is a great vocalist. Clean, crisp. The vocals are the most polished part of this. His voice has a perfect pop edge to them.
Very messy transition into verse one. Given that he was playing John Lennon Off-Broadway, no big surprise that this sounds very much like the very early Beatles.
The arrangement is very chunky, a bit too thick, and very messy. That the vocals manage to float above the din? An amazing feat.
What a great chorus. This song? Extremely slight. It's a breeze to play on the piano, as there is so little to it. But simplicity doesn't mean necessarily translate as 'less than'. It's a charming trifle with just enough edge to it to give it cred.
Some kind of keyboard in there, I can't tell exactly what it is, but it offers up a nice bit of counter-melody during the verses.
It's the static that's so off-putting. The aural debris floating around the recording. It's unfortunate, but it also lends a great deal of authenticity and liveliness to the proceedings.
That guitar line is awesome. And sounds hot. Nice and thick. Typically, home recordings, on the whole, come off quite thin - but this is so not your typical home recording.
Wraps up before the 3:00 mark. Still, given that? I would have shaved an additional 16 seconds off that ending.
Incredibly fun.
Bette Midler
I can't tell you how much I adore Mr. Crenshaw. He's a total talent. Can play like a dream, has great vocal chops, and wears his influences on his sleeve perfectly - paying homage without plagiarizing.
So, it should also not surprise you how very disappointed I was to learn about his comments regarding other artists recording this particular song. It's that Elvis Costello thing. Elvis got over it, so I wonder if Crenshaw did as well. Biting the hand that feeds you? Truly stupid.
In addition... I can't tell you how much I adore the album Bette Midler's version of this song came from. No Frills was a career changer and so refreshing. Post-disco, musically, Midler was at a bit of a loss. She'd tried on so many musical hats since the birth of her singing career, she'd failed to hone any type of identity. So for her to take on this batch of edgier tunes was super refreshing and though it failed to stem her commercial decline, it raised her image and got her a bit of that MTV heat everyone else was benefitting from.
This is one of the best tracks on the album.
Stellar lead-off acapella vocals. Lots of reverb. Pitch perfect with a great 'smile' built in. Happy Bette is the best Bette.
The band is kept way in tow. I would have let that electric guitar bite just a bit more. She sounds great. Love the energy.
Love the big strum of the guitar. And Midler is singing as if she's learning a new language, which, I think she is... this type of pop material was very new to her. For contrast, go listen to her previous studio album, 1979's Thighs And Whispers. This? This is a very different singer. It could have something to do with her tenure as The Rose and the effect playing a Janis Joplin-esque singer had on her subsequent music tour. That transition is all captured in the concert film, Divine Madness. Needless to say, it helped sharpen her pop razor.
This sounds like an updated girl group number.
It definitely pulses, without being propelled. It's the combination of the arrangement and the tempo. It creates a strange sense of drag, as in lag-time. Yet, Midler sounds effervescent enough to carry on, regardless. Yet, this ends up not quite the whip-smart pop it could have been.
I don't care for the sound of the guitar solo. It's muddled. Not as fresh and crisp as Crenshaw's. Too bad. I blame the production work. This is a bit too slick, a bit too smoothed-over. I want snap and crackle. I want liveliness.
Love the 'ooh's' that bring us back to the chorus. And she wisely brings it in at 2:39.
Great job.
The Bellamy Brothers
Great vocals. Very country, mature, gruff.
The drum kit sounds cheap.
Love the acoustic piano on the counter-melody. But again, production sounds cheap and thin.
I like what the electric guitar is doing on the verses. Working almost like castanets.
This is a little too straightforward for my taste. Very similar to the cheap-ass version I play in one of my sets. Trouble is, the energy is too low to catch fire. That might be the fault of the tempo, or simply a choice the performers are making. Laidback country? Meh. I like it to kick ass.
That instrumental break is cheesy.
"And a bell's gonna ring..." Really? I don't think so, dears. You barely have a pulse there.
I like the play-off. Very odd. I never heard that in there.
Great song. So-so version. Suffers from inertia.
Owen Paul
What a lot of noise. I dislike that tropical/reggae-lite vibe. UB40 did similar stuff. It always smacked of inauthenticity and pandering. Cultural appropriation? Actually, I might not have minded but it always sounded so soul-less.
The mix is gawd awful. His vocals are all over the place, too. It's like his voice has no bottom. Well, it doesn't help that it's competing with all the disembodied ephemera.
A bit chunkier on the chorus and it's growing on me. He possesses a bit of David Cassidy's appeal, but Cassidy has a more apparent personality.
Huh. Goes off-scrip at the 1:20 mark. I suppose, trying to stretch it out. This does go on for almost three and a half minutes. Well, if you're going to add something, then make it meaningful. This sounds lifted from a Tears For Fears song.
The only thing more horrifying? That guitar and sax break. Ugh.
This is the noisiest bit of claptrap. How did they make this so annoying? I guess I can see why Crenshaw hates this version. I'm beginning to feel the same.
And he adds his own verse? Well. The gall. (Confession: I do a Buddy Holly song with an extra verse - at least I think it's extra... either I wrote it or I am unaware of its existence, but I have never heard it anywhere else that I know of. If anyone ever calls me on it, I will just say "I don't know.")
Well, if The Bellamy Brothers phoned it in, this one squeezes out "and the bell's gonna ring..." as if he's just creamed his jeans. Not attractive.
Is there a bass guitar? Is there?
I like the drop out... I simply wish the whole thing would. Period.
Oh, it's fun to hate the things others hate.
And starting at the 2:50 mark things go from bad to worse, as the producers simply start throwing things into the studio - things like folding chairs, anvils and ceiling fans. What utter garbage.
Oh, sorry. It's not any of those things. It's Mr. Owens doing an improved backing vocal run. It sounds like someone turned on a blender with nails in it.
And the whacky sax makes a comeback. Ugh.
No.
Bad dog.
Ronnie Spector
HUGE drum lead-off. Nice.
And we are right into it. Very similar to Midler's girl-group take on it, a natural fit for Spector.
But, where Midler has the vocal dexterity and actor's chops to play coy and sly, Spector has that troubling vibrato, which limit her. On the plus side, she has those vocal breaks which add a dimension of toughness and rasp to things.
Is it me? Or does this not sound a great deal like Midler's version? Considering Crenshaw himself is the mastermind behind this recording, hard to believe he was so snarky about Midler's take on the song, given how much he's borrowing here.
This makes me think that had Crenshaw gone into an actual studio and re-recorded this, it would have sounded like this and been at least a modest chart hit. What a shame. What prevented him? Ego?
I like the rhythm section on this a lot. I also think the guitar work it top notch. The mix is thick and just a bit murky, but it works.
What a great recording. Until she adds her a bit of her signature oh-oh-oh-oh. Hmm. Unnecessary.
We know who you are, dear.
The Verdict
What a fun song. It's always stayed with me, from the moment I first heard it.
After listening to Spector's version, I had to go back and listen to Midler again.
I think the original demo is a lot of fun. I adore D.I.Y. But it's not the best version. It's too messy. Too much static. Charming as it is, it doesn't do the song the full pop justice. Crenshaw is in pristine form, but the mix is simply too muddy. Best guitar solo, though.
I am going to pass on both The Bellamy Brothers' and Mr. Owen's versions.
The Bellamy Brothers seem to almost sleepwalk through it, they bring so little to the table. Also, the production (Curb Records!) sounds horribly cheap and thin. It's so straightforward it might as well be any bar band in any town.
As for Mr. Owens. He's not much of a vocalist, to be honest. No color to his voice. The few times he attempts to change things up he ends up shrill or silly sounding. The arrangement is absolute garbage. And all those added bits/lyrics/verses... for shame! I can see why Crenshaw can't get through listening to it. And it was a hit? Well... he is sort of cute in a generic pop star way, but other than that? Maybe it is simply a product of its time.
Spector's version is great. If Ronnie was vocally in better shape and refrained from reminding us of her past glories via the "oh-oh-oh's" (seriously, every song does not need that, Ronnie), I might have been more torn. She sound good. It's exactly what you would expect if you were expecting to hear Spector sing this song. And Crenshaw's guitar work is stellar. But... it's all incredibly similar to Midler's girl group vibe.
So? Why not go with the original? And by that, I mean, Midler's version. Yes, I take exception to some of the production work, the mix and that guitar solo, but... Midler is a joy to hear. She's having fun and does the song justice. Equal parts sly and coy, it's like I said earlier in this post... happy Bette is the best Bette.
So, for me, it's Midler time.
And that? Is never a waste.
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And that's enough of me.
Okay, your turn. You know what to do: leave your choice and thoughts in the comments section. I always welcome a differing opinion.
A well-written song can have a lengthy lifespan and be recorded by a number of artists. Such is the case with today's Who Did It Better? selection.
Now, Barbra Streisand, Cilla Black, and numerous others, including Elaine Paige, have recorded solo versions of the song, but for the purposes of this post, we're only looking at group or duet versions of the song.
I Know Him So Well was written by ABBA's Benny Andersson and Björn Ulvaeus with Tim Rice of Jesus Christ Superstar and Evita fame. The chorus of the song incorporates the chorus of ABBA's 1977 concert stable, I Am An A, a song which was never officially released, though bootleg versions are to be found on YouTube.
The song is a duet from the trio's concept album Chess, which explores the world of international chess champions using the Russian/American cold war as a backdrop. It was later turned into a stage musical. In this duet, two women – Svetlana, the Russian chess champion's estranged wife, and Florence, his mistress – express their bittersweet feelings for him and at seeing their relationships fall apart.
Originally sung by Elaine Paige (as Florence) and Barbara Dickson (as Svetlana), the duet was first released worldwide on the Chess double LP, often referred to as a concept album or album musical, in the autumn of 1984. They'd laid down their vocals separately and never met during the recording of the song, only for the video and subsequent performances on Top of the Pops and the European tours.
Released as a single by Paige and Dickson, the duet took the #1 spot in the UK for four weeks in 1985. Their recording remains in the Guinness Book of Records as the biggest selling UK chart single ever by a female duo. In addition it went to #1 in Ireland, #9 in New Zealand, and #21 in Australia. It would become the second biggest hit in the UK in 1985.
Paige would go on to appear in the original London West End stage production of Chess.
In 1987, a studio version of I Know Him So Well was recorded as a duet by Cissy Houston and her daughter Whitney Houston for Whitney's second album, Whitney. It was released as the 6th and final single from Whitney on November 30, 1988 in Australia, Germany, Netherlands, and Spain. Given little in the way of promotion, no official music video was produced, though there are live performance video-recordings of the pair singing the song. Their version peaked at #14 in the Netherlands and #46 in Germany.
In 1999, British musical group Steps recorded a version for a various artists compilation titled Abbamania. It would later be included on their own album, 2001's The Last Dance. Released as a double-A-side with Words Are Not Enough, it would be the final single released by the group before their abrupt breakup. It debuted at #5 in the UK and peaked at #4 in Scotland and #21 in Ireland.
In 2009, a concert version of the musical featuring Josh Groban and Idina Menzel was released. It included a version of I Know Him So Well sung by Menzel as Florence and fellow Wicked alum Kerry Ellis as Svetlana.
As part of the fundraising drive for Comic Relief 2011, a parody version was recorded by Susan Boyle and Peter Kay as his drag persona Geraldine McQueen. Thanks to its accompanying music video, their version managed to hit #11 in the UK.
For her theatre-inspired 2012 album, Stages, former Spice Girl Melanie C. teamed up with group member Emma Bunton to record a version. It was released as the album's lead single with an accompanying music video. The pair made numerous appearances on British television programs to promote and perform the song, including: This Morning, BBC Children in Need, Live at Shepherd's Bush Empire, The Alan Titchmarsh Show, and Loose Women.
And that's the whole story.
Now? On to the competition.
The Song: I Know Him So Well
The Competitors: Paige/Dickson vs. Houston/Houston vs. Steps vs. Menzel/Ellis vs. Boyle/McQueen vs. Melanie C./Bunton
I Know Him So Well - Elaine Paige, Barbara Dickson
I Know Him So Well - Whitney Houston, Cissy Houston
I Know Him So Well - Steps
I Know Him So Well - Idina Menzel, Kerry Ellis
I Know Him So Well - Susan Boyle, Geraldine McQueen
I Know Him So Well - Melanie C/Emma Bunton
Elaine Paige, Barbara Dickson
Oh, my... we are in it for the long haul today! Sigh.
I have always loved this song. While I have issues with Chess as a stage musical, some of the music is mighty tasty. I always wanted to learn this song, and I'll be damned, but I sat down the other day and tried to find cords for it and... it all flew together in a matter of minutes. I think that's because I have been singing this song on and off for a number of years, but now? I finally really know it! So I can't wait to try it out on an open mic night, maybe with my friend, Laura or the BF singing it as a duet.
I was not aware of it, but Chess turns out to be one of the reasons ABBA broke up! The group had actually recorded seven songs for their follow-up to 1980's The Visitor, when Benny Andersson and Björn Ulvaeus started working with Tim Rice. Coupled with relationship stress and Agnetha developing a form of paralyzing stage fright brought on by a long-term stalker and it was game over for the supergroup. A shame, because you can't listen to this song without imagining Frida and Agnetha singing it.
Instead? We have superstars Elaine Paige and Barbara Dickson.
Adore the maudlin intro. Classical, precise, yet electric thanks to that lovely keyboard sound. So clean. And a bit of flourish with the added edge of a guitar.
Paige has a beautiful bell tone to her voice. She strikes a note and it reverberates. A bit posh sounding, but lovely all the same.
As we move into the second half of the first verse, note the orchestra. Very Russian. Very haughty. Oh, the delicious drama. Paige isn't quite on top of "Won..." but close enough. The strings in the background are so playful. You could argue that Paige is a bit over-strident, but then, this is a number from a potential stage musical and she is a diva of the stage... so good luck winning that one. As is? I think she's a perfect substitute for Agnetha, right down to her overwrought pronunciations. Wait. You act like that's a bad thing? Oh, no my dears. Not where this song is concerned. Given the storyline and characters? Posh and dramatic is the way to go.
Love hearing her dig into that chorus, almost before the orchestra gets a chance to. And enter Dickson... a curious figure in Tim Rice's catalog, as she was the first to sing Another Suitcase In Another Hall from Evita. She's a much beloved figure on British television with a long and varied career. Here, she's got a marvelous opportunity playing both a supporting role - sort of softly backing up Paige as she tears into the first chorus, before stepping out to tell her side of the story.
Their voices blend beautifully. I wouldn't expect less; they are both at the height of their powers as vocalists, well-trained, and experienced.
I just love what Paige does with "more security..." Yes, over the top. More, please.
And isn't Dickson simply lovely; the softer, the sadder but wiser singer.
A big fat homogenized guitar lick takes us to verse two... sort of a bit of foreshadowing for the fireworks to come?
Speaking of fireworks, I know Paige is the fire in this duet, but Dickson is the one who gives me chills. Her first two stanzas? How lived-in. How knowing. Some of the finest line readings ever recorded.
I also adore listening to her sing. She stretches out, takes her time, fills in all the area between the lines. Her technique is breathtaking. Mature? Yes. But such is the fate of the sadder but wiser girl.
Now it's Paige's opportunity to offer support - and she does in the most - forgive me - Streisand means possible - moving between notes in the background, making sure you can't help but notice her. But no worries, Dickson maintains focus, and brings out the big guns. She comes from a place of power, pulling her sound all the way up through the floor, through her legs, through the chest... a lovely, broad sound, so Paige can chirp away all she wishes.
This is such a lovely marriage of voices and style. And the arrangement compliments them perfectly - it's so careful and smart, never threatening to overwhelm or push. Yes, there's a lot going on back there, but it's all kept in check. Musically proper, shall we say?
At the 3:07 mark or so, the producers do the oddest thing... they treat the vocals with a bit of reverb, I believe. It's unnecessary and calls attention to itself because everything has been so naturally felt and delivered up to that moment. It could simply be the effect of the two singing together, but it sounds multi-layered beyond what two voices could produce.
The back and forth is fine. Big snaky guitar... homogenized, but acceptable, given its surroundings.
A big ritardando as we prepare for the dismount. This has indeed been a feat of vocal gymnastics.
Such a lovely ending. It makes me want to hear Barbara Dickson sing an evening of Sondheim.
Bravo, ladies!
Whitney Houston, Cissy Houston
A strummed guitar opening. Nice differentiation. But the big flourish? A bit much, especially followed by those overzealous drums.
Whitney is in lovely shape. Pure tone. She can't resist changing up the melody line a bit and working in a bit of miasma at the end. Not sure if it works. She needs to open her vowel sound on 'wrong' - she's trying to sing the 'ng'. Her first 'far' is odd... more like 'fah' and the second is perfect. I do generally appreciate her articulation.
That little cover into the second half of verse one? What... why? So odd. Hinting at something to come? It sounds so out of place... almost like a key change. Oh, dear... we're messing with the words... 'done' instead of 'played'. Why?
I dislike the guitar. The rhythm track is silly and so middle of the road. And Whitney? While reinvention is commendable... sometimes you don't mess with what the songwriters intended.
I rather like their voices together. Cissy has a nice bottom to her sound. Very grounded. It's a great contrast to Whitney's pop lite. What is that moving underneath? Bass and... big old synth? Like Jaws. Still... nothing yet to take offense to. I get it. They are trying to make this fit in with the rest of Whitney's album - no small feat given the rather musical theatre nature of this selection.
Cissy on 'fantasy and freedom' - bit of a reach. Big scoops and her out-of-control vibrato is showing. Whitney covers by going Hollywood big on 'well'. Followed by a stupid musical sting?
Okay... Cissy had a long career. She was a good singer, never a great one... and she is not up to the task here, folks. That happens with age. It just does. What is with the weird sitar sounding guitar after 'side'? Like a chicken clucking? She's smart. She plays with the melody (too much) and doesn't sit long enough on a note for her vibrato to wobble. I like it when she comes from underneath, there's still a great deal of strength to the woman.
I don't know... second half of verse two? I get it... she's working her way around it, trying to loosen things up, but... that might work on a different type of number... not this one. Whitney sounds nice in the background. But they cut it short, most likely because it's difficult to navigate what Cissy is doing. How do you counter something like that without drawing attention to pitch issues?
But they sound great on chorus two. The arrangement on the other hand? Could they try any less? Elevator snoozeville. There's no interplay. Just chugging on to the end. Punch the clock, go home. These ladies deserved better. They deserved something to play with, to play off. That arrangement is so bland.
Interesting... 'start'. Say no more.
Huh. 'Apart.' Musically? It makes no sense. As a line reading, it makes no sense. Who? Who thought that was a good idea? No doubt the same person who thought Whitney, at this point in her career, singing this song as a duet with HER MOTHER. Looking in your direction, Clive. Damn fool.
Well, if you thought that 'apart' was going to be the end of the fireworks, oh, no my friend. And I have to say... both ladies acquit themselves quite favorably all the way to the end. Whitney goes nuclear and Cissy ramps it up. The let down is the lack of cohesion on the final 'I know him so well..' But, I didn't expect much, so...
I give the ladies props. That arrangement and the musical direction (or lack thereof) and the arrangement sinks this more than Cissy's vibrato ever could have.
Steps
Very close to the original intro. Nice and clean. Not too bombastic.
What is that weird ambient sound buried in the final flourish? A seagull? What an odd thing.
I don't know Steps. They were huge in the UK. I assume they are like Glee, but without a weekly hour on the telly where they ruin our favorite songs.
This singer is breathy, but has great pitch, so far. She goes nasal on 'long', always a no-no. I appreciate her proper articulation. She has a bit of proper training.
Oh, dear. Singer #2... I fear she has 'plans' for this second half of verse one. The plot thickens, the pulse on the other hand... Is she the designated 'bad girl' in the group? Don't they each have a personality? No?
What is with that clanky harpsicord banging out chords?
She sings like she has a cold. Also, they've treated her extended notes. 'Tale' instead of 'tell'? Is she from the American south? Wait. 'Now at least I know him whale?' Really? Letting that stand, are we? Hmm.
Her voice is, temperature-wise a bit warmer than Singer #1 (sorry, I know they have names, but really... why bother?) But she has some very bad habits to overcome, not the least of which is her tendency to launch the odd note like she's gunning for home base.
Oh, guys. Singing. Huh. Guys who sing. Well, I suppose they need the eye candy, right?
Are Singer #1 and Singer #2 in the same group? There's no connection there. And the producers clearly choose to wipe out one over the other on chorus #1. Singer #2 continues to astound me. Someone needs to spell the word 'security' out for her - as one would to a horse. Does she have her own language?
Terrible guitar line leading us to the second verse. So far, there have been a number of odd instrumental choices in this arrangement. It's rather schizophrenic. Do they always tailor each section of a song to the style of the vocalist?
Oh. I was hoping the boys would sing. Solo. This is singer #3, isn't it? Is she the 'popular' one? She's all bollocks when it comes to singing, dears. Listen to her stress the oddest words and attack the beginning of each phrase like a parakeet after a cracker. If an actress gave line readings like these she'd be laughed off the stage.
And her vowel sounds are flat and hard. 'Caan-stantly.' Horrible breath control. Gasping and what not.
I have to go to the video to learn who is singing what.
Wait. Is she the 'perky' one in the group? The first singer is the pure pretty girl, the second is the saucy ice bitch, and the third the perky every-boy-could-have-a-go-with-her girl?
I like that the producers know to go with Singer #1 for the background vocals. I mean, she doesn't muck things up the way the other two do.
Oh, the boys are back for their cameo vocals. Yay.
This is like the coed karaoke version of this song.
"Didn't I Naaaooo." What the ever loving... "Stahhhhhht"? Is she a cow? And that's singer #1 with #2 in tow? Get out.
The harmonies aren't even interesting. Did they take this to the lowest common denominator so Singer #2 wouldn't feel bad?
I understand that the group broke up out of the blue the day after this was released or something dramatically made-up like that.
All in all... not a bad thing. But... couldn't it have happened before they recorded this?
"A lettle bit more than me." And then, what? Did Singer #1 just give up? Mawwww? It's like she opened her mouth and just said... "no, you go find that note. I'm staying right where I am. My nails need to dry." Weirdest sound yet. Was that Singer #1?
Are there three girls? I'm not getting this. This is like The Three Faces Of Eve.
And, what? The guys? Did they clock out early? Done for the day. Home for a bit of down time, a plate of nachos and Mario Bros.?
Oh, wait... that very end... that's... actually nice.
And best of all?
It does, indeed, end.
So many questions. Like... was this band put together via some kind of sweepstakes? You know... they found a magic ticket or something and won a spot in a pop band? Can't imagine an adult doing this on purpose. Or did they all start out as something similar and then morphed via adolescence into the three gorgons (with Chip and Ernie in tow)?
Fascinating.
Idina Menzel, Kerry Ellis
Idina Menzel should only sing one song. No, not that one. Gorgeous. It's a dance single she put out and I adore it. In fact, I am going to go on YouTube and find it right after I slog through three more versions of this.
Yes... that's right, dears. Three more versions.
And here I thought being fisted was painful!
This was from the live concert version of Chess starring Josh Groban which no one asked for, ever. I remember seeing and thinking, "What? Is this a free giveaway? Buy three bottles of dishwashing liquid and you get... this?"
Hmm. Sound quality's a bit thin. Clean, but thin.
How many n's are at the start of 'Nothing's'? So, odd... I know it's Idina singing, but it's like there are three voices trying to escape. Or did someone jump in and sing 'it lasts eternally'?
And I thought Steps version was schizophrenic. She frequently sounds like a magic elf about to steal all your underpants. And she just can't resist leaning back and biting off those bigger notes. Someone needs to tell her... just because, doesn't mean you should.
"Madness", indeed.
And she winds up for the pitch... "I knoooow him sooo well!" Big scoops. Why not always go big?
Kerry Ellis, I like. Though, what's with singers stressing 'be' in the phrase 'move my world to be with him?', as if their lives depended on it?
Ellis sounds good live. More of a pop singer, actually. Or maybe cosmo country. There's a rasp to some her stuff which is feels very natural, especially in contrast to the phantom witch woman hovering in the background.
I'm kind of hoping they both wrestle this thing to the ground by going all out and physically attacking one another.
"Madness", indeed. And then she chews up and spits out "more security." Why rush through 'security'? There's that wonderful 'u' sound in the center, like a chewy bit of nougat.
It is like Hamilton, isn't it?
As in... Margaret Hamilton. If she could sing, she would sound exactly like Idina.
Someone needs to tell Idina this is a different show and that she's no longer in that other show. I bet they paired her with Ellis in the hopes that upon hearing what normal singing sounds like, Idina would take the hint?
Horrifying ending. Not a bit of shame.
Did they rehearse this?
Well, two to go.
Susan Boyle, Geraldine McQueen
Sorry about using the video version, but it was the only version I could find on YouTube. I wanted to include this... not only did it chart, but... Susan Boyle!
I think Susan Boyle has a most amazing instrument. I know she can be a bit staid, but her technique? Among the finest. Such a rare, natural sounding tone. And no bad habits. Truly gifted.
Wait. I'm confused. Was this the parody version? Or was that Steps?
Oh, no... it is this one.
Wow... they went all out and bought a Casio - at Walmart, I'm thinking.
Boyle is lovely, as expected. A bit breathy, but this is a one-off. They probably rushed her out of the dressing room with the tissue still under her collar.
Peter Kay holds his own. Well, 'tucks his own' more likely.
Kay demonstrates exactly why this song is so much fun to sing. I don't know much about him, but Geraldine has got it together. I could nitpick, but... this is good fun, and for a good cause. There's no power to his voice and even less color, but he manages to primly purse his lips and pluck the right notes in a fey way.
As for Boyle, she's actually sung the song quite legitimately with Elaine Paige herself, no less. You couldn't ask for a better duet partner, for she never competes - she simply sings. And yes... complain all you want, she's not your typical entertainer. She's a singer. A good one. An evening with her? Well worth the price of admission.
As for Kay, what a good sort. Again, I know nothing about him, so if he's in jail for kiddie porn or there's a video on YouTube of him in blackface, I do apologize. But as is, this was great fun.
The video is a hoot, too... subtle and fun, especially if you're familiar with the source material.
Melanie C/Emma Bunton
What on earth? Why. What did this song do to deserve this?
Oh, alright. Let's do this.
Lovely piano intro. Clean. And the flourishes? Fine, too, actually. Nice and full-bodied. The timpani? Perfectly placed in the mix with just the right emphasis.
So far? Very tasteful.
Oh, dear. Mel C has a tiny, sandpapery voice. This is not a song for little girl voices, dear. Grownups. This is a grownup song. Colorless. Terrible tone. Bad vowels. No idea how to reach a note.
My apologies to Step.
This is the karaoke version.
The arrangement is a bit busy, but I think they're doing their best to take focus off the rather dreadful, though well-intentioned, I am sure, vocals.
Oh, listen to her go all pop and bratty on 'fine'. Emma, on the other hand, sounds sweet.
Who coached this woman? Who told her she could sing this song? Oh... damn. Firing squads have gone out of fashion, haven't they?
You know what I know so well? Mel C sings like shite. No wonder she needs to be surrounded by four other singers.
The arrangement goes all cheap and sugary once Bunton starts in. She's a breath of fresh air after Mel C, but no great shakes. Very breathy. Bright. Nice tone. A bit lite. Very chippy. But immensely likable.
Was this done on a dare? Was it a game of Truth Or Dare and Mel C. chose 'dare' and someone said, go do an album of Broadway tunes?
Oh, once the two of them join forces, it's much more palatable. Bunton detracts from Mel C's terrible vocal habits and while it's not exactly Paige and Dickson, it's not shite. More like a vegemite sandwich.
And they certainly didn't go cheap with the orchestra. It's all there, blazing away. Rather lovely.
And there's something about Bunton, it's like a Disney princess or if Bambi could sing.
If that ending got any breathier we'd all be handing out a palm full of mints.
Well. That ended.
The Verdict
Oh, lawd.
Sometimes I want to apologize for the things I put us through. But then, the one I really need to apologize to the most is... myself. Clearly I have some deep-rooted dislike, as I keep putting myself through things like this week after week.
I suppose it's time I talked to someone about it.
I wonder if Susan Boyle would care to come 'round for a cuppa?
Okay... let's wrap this up.
Paige and Dickson are spot on. As showy as Paige gets, it's Dickson who holds the line. Such a fine singer. They compliment each other so well. And, I think they have the best arrangement, although I did come to like Mel C. and Bunton's.
Whitney and Cissy? Oh, no, child. What was Clive Davis thinking? That is a shaking-my-head musical moment right there. I don't know what the intent was, but it is all so damn wrong. Ain't nobody need to hear that ever.
And that goes for Step and Idina Menzel, as well. Kerry Ellis holds her own just fine, but Idina's musical sensibilities are batshit cray cray. There's not enough elfin magic to be found to make me listen to that version again. Though I do want to be there the day she finally splits into three separate entities.
As for Steps? Well, I suspect the drama behind the scenes is where it really was at when it came to that odd mixed lot. It was like listening to a competition where each singer tries to sing worse than the one who sang the line before them. This was a popular thing? This really happened? Or was it one of those Saturday morning cartoon things? Like TheBugaloos? Or The Banana Splits? Did one save box tops from cereal boxes and mail them in to receive the group's latest CD?
Boyle and McQueen? Oh, how fun was that. Peter Kay. Bravo, my dear. No, you can't sing much, but that sure was fun. And Boyle? What a lovely singer. I really would like to hear her and Dickson have a go at it... but then, I probably don't want to hear this song again for quite some time.
And Mel C. and Baby Bunton. Well, Emma could actually charm the pants off anyone, even this old dried-up gay guy. But Mel C.? Is she an aerobics instructor? This is a prank, right? Oh, you Brits and your whacky sense of humor.
I've seen Fawlty Towers!
So, my choice.
Well, it's obvious, isn't it?
Barbra Streisand.
Of course.
She duets with herself. What's not to love?
No... it's Paige and Dickson by a mile, my dears. The tone is a bit haughty, but I do love the drama. And those two? Well, they got it right the first time.
--- ---
And that's enough of me...
Okay, your turn. You know what to do: leave your choice and thoughts in the comments section. I love to hear a differing opinion.
That's all for now. I do apologize. It was an awful lot to ask.
Oh, look... videos!
Until next time...
Thanks for reading... and listening!
I Know Him So Well - Elaine Paige, Barbara Dickson
