Wonderland Burlesque’s Turdscooter of the Week: Former American Apparel CEO Dov Charney and the Board of Directors Who Failed to Fire Him in a Timely Manner

Wonderland Burlesque’s Turdscooter of the Week:  Former American Apparel CEO Dov Charney and the Board of Directors Who Failed to Fire Him in a Timely Manner

Apparently it is okay to be a serial misogynistic, sexual predator if you are also the CEO of a large company.  That can be the only explanation for why former-CEO, Dov Charney remained employed at American Apparel as long as he did.

Charney, who planned  to ”be remembered as one of the great CEOs of our time and of (his) generation," was fired last week due to his “conduct with women”.

Allegations began flying and eye brows raised as early as 2004, when Charney masturbated “eight or so times” in front of a reporter for ‘Jane’ magazine and a female co-worker.  

It seems to me that the boom really should have been lowered at that time, but, no, it took the Board of Directors a full ten years, which exacerbated the situation by allowing this creep to work his special magic.

Among the allegations:

• Crude language and gestures,
• Conducting job interviews in his underwear
• Ordering the hiring of women in whom he had a sexual interest
• Gifting a female co-worker with a vibrator
• Conducting a meeting with a female co-worker wearing a ‘cock sock’, inviting her to masturbate with him, and then firing her when she revealed plans to meet with a lawyer
• Ordering an employee to pretend to masturbate in front of him
• Demanding that ‘ugly people’ be fired from American Apparel stores
• Keeping an employee at his apartment as a sex slave
• Retaliating against the women who sued for sexual harassment by posting naked pictures of them online
• Rubbing dirt in the face of a store manager while calling him a “fag” and a “wanna-be Jew” 

During a deposition for one of the plethora of lawsuits brought against him and the company during his decade-long reign of terror, Charney admitted to using the words “slut” and “cunt” while in the workplace. “There are some of us that love sluts ... It could be also be an endearing term,” he testified.

Regarding these lawsuits he told CNBC that they were “testimony to (his) success”.

Hey, I am all for sexual freedom, but it is always a bad idea to try dipping your pen in the company ink.  Well, that and featuring yourself in pink underwear in your company’s ads – especially when you don’t have anything to show off. (I mean, where is it?  Did he tuck it like a drag queen?)

The only thing worse than Charney’s conduct?  That of American Apparel’s Board of Directors - who should have put an end to this man’s misogynistic sexual tyranny way back in 2004.  It only seems fair that they should all get the axe as well for failure to do their duty.

 

Hopefully this is one turdscooter who will not be floating back to the surface any time soon.  America needs time to erase the skidmarks he’s left on our collective consciousness (not to mention that photo of him in pink underwear).

 So, grab a used dildo from Mr. Charney’s bedside table, and give this week’s Wonderland Burlesque Turdscooter of the Week the kind of bon voyage he so richly deserves (and will no doubt enjoy).  Also: be sure to save some of that KY Jelly for American Apparel’s Board of Directors, because they deserve a little of the action, as well.