Wonderland Burlesque: Wonderland Burlesque's Down The Rabbit Hole: The 5,000 Fingers of Dr. T.

Sunday, January 18, 2026

Wonderland Burlesque's Down The Rabbit Hole: The 5,000 Fingers of Dr. T.

Wonderland Burlesque's

Down The Rabbit Hole

The 5,000 Fingers of Dr. T

Down The Rabbit Hole merely places a spotlight on something slightly unusual that's caught my interest. With the help of Wikipedia, YouTube, and other sites, I gather information and learn something new.

Today, we learn all about the box-office bomb produced by Stanley Kramer and written by Dr. Suess, the avant garde musical The 5,000 Fingers of Dr. T.

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From Wikipedia:

The 5,000 Fingers of Dr. T. is a 1953 American musical fantasy about a boy who dreams himself into a world ruled by a diabolical piano teacher enslaving children to practice piano forever. It is the only non-documentary feature film written by Theodor Seuss Geisel (Dr. Seuss), who wrote the story, screenplay, and lyrics. It was directed by Roy Rowland, with many uncredited scenes directed by producer Stanley Kramer. The film stars Peter Lind Hayes, Mary Healy, Hans Conried, and Tommy Rettig. The singing voice of Tommy Rettig was dubbed by Tony Butala, founder of The Lettermen.

Geisel submitted a live-action storyline for The 5,000 Fingers of Dr. T. in 1951. He followed it up with a 1200-page script with underlying "themes of world dominance and oppression coming out of World War II." Relocating from La Jolla, California, to Los Angeles, Geisel hoped it would "enable him to be more involved in the production." His influence on set design and choreography is evident throughout the film.

Although Geisel was unaware of it at the time, his film had landed in the middle of a bitter feud between film producer/director Stanley Kramer and the head of Columbia Pictures, Harry Cohn. Thus the shooting of the film was fraught with tension from the start. Kramer had been forbidden by Cohn from directing the movie himself, and had instead appointed a studio journeyman, Roy Rowland. Cohn also interfered with the production constantly by sending voluminous and unwanted notes to Kramer and Geisel.

Hans Conried was enthusiastic about the role, saying in retrospect, "I had never had any such part before, never have since and probably never will again. We rehearsed for eight weeks before I was engaged to shoot for eight weeks, an extravagance that I as a bit player had never known. If it had been a success, with my prominent part in the title role, it would have changed my life."
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Prior to release, a 'preview version' was received poorly by a test audience. That prompted heavy cuts by the studio and a week of reshoots, included a new opening scene. Of the original 20 musical numbers filmed in their entirety, nine were removed. The removed songs still survive with the complete musical soundtrack. The 'preview version' featuring the removed footage is now considered lost. Columbia Pictures, hoping to recoup some of its investment, released the film a second time in 1958 with the entire elevator scene cut, under the title Crazy Music.

The score was composed by Frederick Hollander with lyrics by Dr. Seuss. It earned an Oscar nomination for Best Scoring of a Musical Picture.

At the Hollywood premiere, the first patrons began to trickle out after 15 minutes. After an hour it had become a tsunami. The leading man Hans Conried was quoted as saying by biographer Suzanne Gargiulo, "At the end there was only one boy left and he was waiting for his mother to pick him up".

The film received negative reviews from critics. Critic Bosley Crowther called the film "strange and confused" and writing: "...this is not only abstruse in its symbols and in its vast elaboration of reveries but also dismally lacking in the humor or the enchantment such an item should contain."

Geisel regarded the film as a "debaculous fiasco" and omitted mention of it in his official biography. So demoralized by the experience, he even stated after the film "Hollywood is not suited for me and I am not suited for it."

Hans Conried reflected on the film's box office failure in a 1970 interview with Leonard Maltin: "The picture never made its print money back. It was comparable only to Wilson as one of the great money-losers of all time; it would stop conversation for some years at any Hollywood social gathering."

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