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TMI Questions – Classic Edition: Road Trip

TMI Questions – Classic Edition: Road Trip

Ah, nothing better to cleanse the palate of the mind than a good road trip.

Given my recent camping trip, I thought this Classic Edition of Sean’s TMI Questions a good fit.

I must confess, I am suffering from a vacation hangover.

I returned rather euphoric.  However, the wonder, glow, and awe generated quickly collapsed with the onslaught of reality. 

Welcome home.  Bah.

It was a great vacation, a perfect camping trip. And, I must admit, in many ways, I am still on vacation – so unwilling am I to let go of such an idyllic time. But then, I’m also currently unwilling to deal with my job, my ex, the dogs, my mother, the rental properties, my car… 

You get the picture. 

You know the feeling.

It’s a vacation hangover.  You were enjoying yourself, but now? 

Now, reality is calling and it has your number.

Questions designed to reveal Too Much Information

TMI Questions – Classic Edition: Road Trip

Worst experience you ever had in a car? (Not including accidents.)

That would be during my audition days. 

This was pre-GPS and pre-cell phone time.  I rarely had any sense of direction (in the car, as in life), but my inner-wiring seemed to go particularly schizoid / on the fritz any time I had to be somewhere at a certain time and it was to be my first time finding the place. 

I would start out hopeful enough, but end up in an absolute rage as the clock ticked and I remained clueless. 

Once, I had an appointment to discuss directing a show at a theatre where I very much wanted to get my foot in the door.  I’d actually already accomplished that by taking a major supporting role in their production of ‘The Royal Family’.  They liked me, and I was a shoe-in to be hired as a director for the next season.

The appointment was at the artistic director’s house, which, for some reason, I was under the false impression that I knew where it was.  I arrived in the general area and began driving up and down streets looking for… I don’t know what. 

I had no address. 

I hadn’t bothered to ask for it.  Nor did I have a phone number.  But still, I looked and looked, getting more and more upset with myself and the situation.

I have no idea what I was thinking, but looking back, it seems I rarely did much thinking in those days.  Needless to say, they were pissed and I was never offered another opportunity.  

Dumb, dumb, dumb.

Small wonder my theatre career never caught fire, huh?

Driver or navigator?

Driver, please.  As demonstrated above, I am in sore need of a navigator. 

Thank goodness for GPS and Google Maps.  Otherwise, I’d still be lost out there somewhere, driving around, vainly searching for where I need to be.

But even with GPS, I am rather hopeless.

Take my latest road trip with the boyfriend.  We would be searching for a given site, and the GPS lady would tell me what to do – only I would try to turn a road before the road she’d mentioned, or I would turn left instead of right (because I am very challenged that way).  If the boyfriend hadn’t been in the car, correcting me at every (literal) turn, I don’t know where we’d ended up.

He was very patient with me, by the way.  Something I greatly appreciated.  He turned out to be a most perfect travelling companion.

You know it’s odd… I am great at seeing things from a distance and having a sense of where things are.  I can draw you a map of every house I ever lived in.  I get a sense of the layout of a city very quickly.  You know, as if seen from above.  But in the moment, in the actual surroundings?  I get all flummoxed. 

I guess I’m much better with a distant perspective. 

When it’s right on top of me?  I can’t see for shit.

Planes, trains or automobiles?

I used to fly a lot.  I haven’t much since 911. 

Peter Griffin is right.  911 changed everything.

I rather hate flying now and will only do so if driving is out of the question.  It’s uncomfortable.  I dislike the logistics involved: getting there, luggage, carry-ons, security, other passengers, poor service, airports, waiting in lines, etc. 

It all ends up feeling so unnecessary and heavy.  I’m much too independent to be so dependent. I’d rather strike out on my own.

Trains?  I’ve never taken Amtrak.  However, it seems the boyfriend, who is already planning our next vacation, has decided on Westerly, Rhode Island, which we will take a train to visit next year.  Very excited about it.  I love trains.  Always have, even as a child.  I like their history and design history.  Plus, they look so fashionable in all those old black and white movies, and I really do hope there is a Bar Car, where I can sip on a nice gin martini while watching the world fly past.

Automobile.  Yes.  Due to my independent streak (and desire to not put up with other people’s bullshit), a car is the way to go for me. 

You know, in spite of my inability to actually get anywhere on time in one.

Best road trip?

I’ve had many.  The ones through the Southwest part of the United States were long, arduous, and fascinating.

However, my favorite is my most recent; the camping trip I went on with the boyfriend.  We had a marvelous time – biking, playing tourist, swimming, sipping cocktails while sitting by the campfire, climbing observation towers, exploring small towns, and tooling down the highway. 

He suffers from road hypnosis and doesn’t drive, so I was behind the wheel while he played navigator.  It worked well for us.  I like it quiet.  Some conversation is welcome, but constant babble wears on me and causes me to be a crabby and inattentive driver.

With the boyfriend, picking a place to eat was never a problem.  He was also adept at cooking tofuturkey dogs, building a fire, and pretty much game for anything I suggested, and I, for anything he thought might be fun. Setting up camp and breaking it down was a snap. 

He was in charge of the music.  It was an eclectic mix which included, among others, Journey’s Greatest Hits, an Edith Piaf collection, Ella Fitzgerald singing Cole Porter, the OCR of ‘Hedwig and the Angry Inch’, and a six CD collection – the soundtrack to one of his favorite video games. 

Yeah, that last one… we never got beyond disc one; it was pretty annoying stuff.   Some it was fine.  The stuff that sounded like a movie soundtrack?  No problem.  Very majestic stuff.  But then there was the rest of it which I would describe as elevator music conducted by a Ninja with a chainsaw and scored by caffeine-addicted mice.   It was the only time I hit the eject button.

That aside?  No arguments.  Nary a disagreement.  It was all smooth sailing.

It was better than I could have imagined in many, many ways and I can’t wait to do it again!

What's the farthest you've gone in a car? (Sex, not distance.)

All the way and more.

I’ve been very creative (and limber) when fooling around in cramped spaces (a challenge being 6’1”).  Whether that meant straddling the dude and bouncing up and down as I faced him as he sat in the driver’s seat, or lying back in the passenger seat with my legs in the air as he plowed away while choking me (some kind of hostage fantasy – no longer for me), or something as vanilla as giving or receiving a blow job in the front seat.

Yep.  Been there, done that.  Won’t repeat any of it, unless the boyfriend has something in mind.

Now… Amtrak. 

That might be hella fun.

I do love a good challenge.

And a change of scene.

What kind of car do you drive?

2005 Silver Saturn Ion

Love that car.  It is in great shape, too.  I keep up on it and it’s only been to one shop its entire life.  Looks great, too.  Oh, there are a few surface scratches which need to be buffed out, but overall, it is a great looking car.

As stated in the past, my identity is not tied up in my car.  I like to keep it simple.  It needs to look good, handle great, be good on gas mileage, have a manual transmission and appear modest and discreet. 

A car is transportation, and little else.

What kind do you dream of?


Right now? 

All my fantasies involve Amtrak trains.


mistress maddie said...

Well , I'm so glad to hear your first camping trip was a suck success!!!!! As you know, I can have my arm twisted to travel anytime!

whkattk said...

Road trips can be the best fun! Haven't done one in many years now. I kinda miss them - a friend introduced me to what she called "touchy-feely" trips, stopping anytime something grabs the attention.

I've gotten hand jobs and blow jobs on cross country road trips. I've taken road trips driving naked - and whacking off.

Travel by plane has become such a hassle - though that is the only type I've managed to do since 9-11...