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Friday, March 19, 2010

The Kinky Report: March 16, 2009-March 15, 2010

Introduction

On March 16, 2009, I began keeping a diary of sorts in order to capture information regarding my sexual exploits. The following is a list of statistics I was able to glean from the recorded data. The diary is fairly accurate as I did a relatively good job of consistently recording my exploits. However, as I reviewed the year I noticed that on at least two occasions I failed to remember what had taken place on a given date (noting it as such) and I also noticed that several experiences were not recorded though I do recall them having taken place (two repeated scenarios with individuals that were not recorded in the diary on as many occasions as I know them to have taken place).

Stats

Closed for Business: 40 Days
Stood Up: 8 Times
No, Didn’t Find Anything or Not in the Mood: 157 Days
Total Days of No Sexual Activity: 205 (56% of Year)
Number of Days I Did Look and Find or Plan: 160 (1.67 Men per Day) (44% of Year)
Total Number of Times I Participated in Sexual Activity: 267

ActivityNo Cum: Number of Times Guys Failed or Chose Not to Cum: 38
Flip Flop: 6
Me Top: 16
Oral on Me: 18
Oral: 148
Anal: 4
Oral and Anal: 92
Kiss: 65
Rim(me or them): 26
J/O: 19
Menage a trios: 12
Group Activity: 5
Blindfolded: 35

Location
Total Outdoors: 160 (60% of all sexual activity for year)
Bog/Wirth: 50
Prairie: 74
St Paul: 3
East River Road: 33

Car: 14 (At the listed parks)

Total Indoors: 107 (40% of all sexual activity for the year)
Rehab House: 33
My Place: 11
Their Place: 47
Hotel: 4
Public (Garage, Restroom, Sauna, Gym, or Their Office): 12

The ExperienceExceptional: 28 (10.5%)
Good: 74 (27.5%)
Average: 108 (40.5%)
Bad: 57 (21%)
Repeat: 122

RaceWhite:225 (84%)
Black: 20 (7.5%)
Asian: 2 (1%)
East Indian: 6 (2%)
Hispanic: 14 (5%)
Size
Over 8: 54 (20%)
7 to 8: 99 (37%)
Under 7: 114 (43%)
Age
20’s: 35 (13%)
30’s: 74 (28%)
40’s: 102 (38%)
50’s: 53 (20%)
60’s: 3 (1%)

Physical Condition
Good Shape: 89 (33%)
Okay Shape: 124 (46%)
Bad Shape: 54(20%)
Handsome: 64 (24%)
Bald: 42 (16%)


Definition of Terms

Closed for Business: 40
Due to a series of minor surgeries that took place during the year and the aftermath of recovery associated, I was physically unable to participate in sexual activity on these days. These may have also been days when I had a cold and abstained. This accounts for 12% of the year.

Stood Up: 8
These are occasions when I had plans with an individual and that individual failed to show. This would sour my mood and curtail activities for that day.

No, Didn’t Find Anything or Not in the Mood: 157
Data failed to distinguish between these two reasons for lack of sexual activity.

Flip Flop: 6
Describes occasions when an individual would perform anal sex as a top with me in the role of bottom and then I would perform anal sex as a top with them in the role of bottom.

Me Top: 16
Times I served as the only top during the encounter, describing occasions when I would perform anal sex as a top with them in the role of bottom.

Oral on Me: 18
Occasions when I received oral sex from another – this may, or may not have been done in conjunction with other types of sexual activity.

Oral: 148
Occasions when the only activity engaged in, other than kissing, fondling or frottage, was me performing oral sex on an individual

Anal: 4
Occasions when the only activity engaged in was me being topped (receiving anal sex or bottoming) by an individual (no kissing, fondling or frottage).

Oral and Anal: 92
Occasions when I performed oral sex on an individual and received anal sex from the same individual.

Kiss: 65
Occasions when kissing was involved.

Rim (me or them): 26
Occasions when rimming was involved. I performed it on them and/or they performed it on me.

Menage a trios: 12
Occasions when two individuals and myself participated in sexual activities with one another at the same time.

J/O: 19
Occasions when masturbation (mutual or solo) was performed on myself by another or by myself on another – this may, or may not have been done in conjunction with other types of sexual activity.

Group Activity: 5
Occasions when 3 or more individuals and myself participated in sexual activities with one another at the same time.
Least number present (includes self) to qualify as Group Activity: 4.
Greatest number of individuals present (includes self) during a Group Activity session: 6

Blindfolded: 35
Occasions when I wore a blindfold during sexual activity. Typical scenario featured me wearing blindfold before other(s) arrived, until other(s) departed.

Total Outdoors: 160
Number of sexual encounters that took place outside, typically in wooded areas

Bog/Wirth: 50, Prairie: 74, St Paul: 3, East River Road: 33
Parks/Wooded Areas where sexual activity took place

Car: 14 (At the listed parks)
This number in included in the number of total outdoor sexual encounters and is accounted for as they related to the park/wooded area where initial contact and subsequent agreement to engage in sexual activity took place.

Total Indoors: 107
Number of sexual encounters that took place indoors (Private House or Public Building)

Rehab House: 33
Occasions when an individual(s) would come to a house I was rehabbing for the purposes of sexual activity

Hotel: 4
Scenario where I traveled to their (out of town visitor) hotel room, here in the Twin Cities

Public (Garage, Restroom, Sauna, Gym, or Their Office): 12
Occasions when sex took place in a non-traditional location other than outdoors

The Experience (Exceptional: 27, Good: 73, Average: 107, Bad: 56)
These ratings are defined by my personal likes and dislikes as relating to sexual activity and/or the physical attributes or behavior of the individual(s) involved. Ratings are of a purely subjective nature.

Repeat: 122
Occasions when I had engaged in sexual activity with a given individual on more than one occasion. This number also includes the first time I played with a given individual who I then engaged in sexual activity at another time during the defined year. It also includes individuals with whom I engaged in sexual activity with prior to the beginning of the defined year, but had occasion to have engage in sexual activity during the defined year. Dubious nature/value of given statistic duly noted.

Size (Over 8: 54, 7 to 8: 99, Under 7: 114)
As it relates to the length of an individuals fully erect penis in units of inches. Measurements based on personal visual determination or claims of individual as stated in emails and then verified via personal visual determination.

Age (20’s: 35, 30’s: 74, 40’s: 102, 50’s: 53, 60’s: 3)
In terms of years, based on personal visual determination or claims of individual as stated in emails or during conversation and then verified via personal visual determination.

Physical Condition:
As it relates to an individual’s body in terms of muscle tone, percentage of body fat and a visual determination of physical health. Determination subjective in nature.

Good Shape: 89 (33%)
Individual displayed one or more of the following attributes: Muscular Physique, Toned Physique, Low % of Body Fat, Flat Abdomen. A Build that could be described as: Muscular, Toned, Trim, Worked-Out, Somewhat Worked-Out, Buff, Swimmers, Thin, Wiry, Athletic, Jock, Slim, Twink

Okay Shape: 124 (46%)
Individual displayed one or more of the following attributes: A Somewhat Muscular Physique, A Somewhat Toned Physique, Average to Somewhat More Than Average % of Body Fat, A Slightly Protruding Belly (Hard). A Build that could be described as: Beefy, Bear, Average,

Bad Shape: 54(20%)
Individual displayed one or more of the following attributes: A Lack of Muscular Tone, More Than Average to Excessive % of Body Fat, A Distended Belly (Soft)
A Build that could be described as: Flabby, Large, Big, Fat, Obese, Soft, Unkempt,

Handsome: 64
As it relates to the construction and contours of an individuals face, determination subjective in nature.

Bald: 42
Includes individuals with shaved, closely buzzed or naturally bald heads. Does not include individuals who are balding or have an “eagles nest” hair style.

Conclusion
I’m a big slut.

But there is room to grow.

Seriously… what is with all the down time? Had I tracked my activities in downtown Minneapolis during the mid to late 90’s and early 00’s, I’m sure my batting average would have been way up. As it is I seem to be making up in quantity what I lack in consistency.

So, am I sex addict? Well, duh. But does it have a negative impact on my life? Answer: sort of. But only during that time period when I’m waiting to hear the results of my latest blood tests. The anxiety experienced is intensified during those times when dudes send me vague emails informing me that they got an email from someone who got an email from someone who may have played with somebody who may have played with somebody who has… gasp… syphilis! But so far, knock on wood, no V.D. for me. And considering the number of times I played with total strangers this year I guess I should consider myself pretty lucky. I get checked out four times a year. And if you play as hard as I do, you should, too.

Disclaimers

There are a few of the stats that fail to capture much information, such as the Repeat figure (as noted). And I am wondering if I can go back to the hard data and determine exactly how many different men those 267 sexual experiences relate to, because that would be interesting to know.

I think there was a time when I first started the diary that I did try to get out there every day and find a little something-something to report. I also worry that I may have been numbers-driven and therefore had sex with guys whom I wasn’t into at all, but then that goes back to the whole mercy fuck thing which I am so over.

Trends

I did notice a drop off in activity around the Xmas Holidays. I also noticed a drop in activity during the fourth quarter. I think this was due, in part, to a number of things: 1/ I learned to say no, 2/ I spent less time on the internet looking for hook-ups, and 3/ it may have been a reverse reaction to my overachieving ways of the summer months.

The whole getting fucked wearing a blindfold thing was new to me this year. I’d never done it before. That figure is a little misleading, since a few of the times that I wore the blindfold involved more than one guy (2-5 minus self). That said, the group and ménage trios figures are accurate, because no matter the number of participants, each event was only counted once.

I was surprised by the number of times guys didn’t cum or chose not to cum. I mean, that’s the whole point of playing, isn’t it? I failed to capture the number of times I did not cum, but then I know that when I don’t cum it’s because I don’t want to - the moment passed, or I don’t want to – I have something else lined up right after you, sugar.

The data on race kind of surprised me. I am an equal opportunity enjoyer, so I was surprised by the number of white guys. I just have a feeling that there are not enough minorities out there looking for the kind action I am, since a lot of what I reported falls under the category of chance encounters in the woods. I certainly never turn anyone down because of the color of their skin. And looks? Being a rather unattractive man I am very liberal when it comes to how handsome or not-so-handsome someone is. In fact, I have gone on the record on this very blog saying that I actually prefer men with flaws. Appreciating the flaws keeps it interesting. It also significantly increases the number of times I get laid. Still, I must say I was surprised by the number of really handsome men that I was able to attract. I don’t know what they see in me, but I am thinking that if it is true that a hard dick has no conscience than I am also thinking it might be true that a hard dick places a thick coat of Vaseline over the lens of one’s eyes.

Of the 267 encounters there was only one I would never-ever do again. Of those same 267 encounters there is only one that I truly wish I could have a second chance, a do-over, only because my performance sucked (and not in a good way).

Final Thoughts

Summer is just around the corner, and I have no idea just how I will be spending it. I’m not sure what is planned for the Prairie this year. Will they turn it into a parking lot? Will they carve it up into go-cart trails? Who knows? All I know is my ass will be out there, naked to the sun somewhere. And wherever my ass is bare, you know you got a shot at hitting that, so bring it on.

This also marks an entire year of once-a-week blog entries. That is something I wanted to achieve; to write something once a week. They all haven’t been that interesting, but I do try and change things up once in awhile. As I have hinted at recently, writing about nothing but sexual experiences gets real tiring after a point. I don’t know what I will be writing about in the coming year, but I am sure my sexual exploits will continue to be a topic I revisit from time to time. Truth is, other than today’s post, I never know what I’m going to write about until I start writing it.

I want to thank those of you who have contacted me. I appreciate your comments, criticisms and concern and understand those of you who need to remain anonymous. Discretion is a good thing.

The other night I had a dream, that I lived in this huge house and it was filled with stuff, like a hoarder’s house. I had to clean it all out and take it to the front yard where there was a big, wooden box with a lid, like a coffin, only cruder. I was compelled to take all that stuff, shove it in the box, hammer on the lid and cover it with dirt. I think, based on a lot of what I have been mulling over recently, that the stuff in the house represents my past. This dream is my subconscious telling me it is time to let go. I am not the person I once was, nor do I want to be. I don’t want to try and reclaim who I was before because it’s the one sure way of robbing myself of today. Regret is that great sucking sound your life makes when you’re not living in the moment. I struggle with myself. I tell myself I’ve lost focus and that I’m no longer being true to who I once was because I’m not doing the things I once did. I’m not utilizing the talents that I spent years struggling to develop. But that fact is, I’m not doing those things because… I don’t want to. I tried, really hard and I failed a lot. And it was okay to fail, because I learned. And one of the things I learned was that I don’t want to be involved in the same types of activities or expose myself to the types of people that might have once led to a bigger life. I need to accept that living a tiny life is just fine. There’s no shame in it. People do it all the time, some without ever realizing it. And that’s okay. There is joy to be found there.

There comes a time when you must embrace that which fits you.

So, here’s to my tiny life.

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