TMI Questions – Classic Edition:
Would You Rather…
Would You Rather…
Hmmm. I feel the need, so I went back and found
myself one of Sean’s old posts – from Tuesday, July 17, 2012, to be exact. So get ready for a Classic Edition of TMI
Questions.
We all
day dream about the choices we would make if we could; especially when it comes
to altering our past. But sometimes it’s fun to explore the choices we would
never in a million years have a say in.
There
are so many things I would like to have control over and change, but ultimately
that would be robbing life of doing what life does. As I’ve matured, I’ve managed to recognize
that which I have no control over and accept it. Trust me; filling our lives with that kind of
delusion isn’t helping anybody. Much
better to let life do its thing.
Sure,
we can influence it, but ultimately… life is in control, and the sooner we
respect that, the happier we will be.
TMI QUESTIONS:
Questions designed to reveal Too Much
Information
Link: http://tmiquestions.blogspot.com/
TMI Questions: Would You Rather…
Have eyes that always smile or a voice that
makes people calm?
I would
choose the voice. I dislike mine, very
much, and would love to have the kind of purr that John Malkovich is able to
summon, or Patrick Stewart, or Jeremy Irons, or Hugh Laurie.
I don’t
know if others find those type of creepy / sophisticated tones comforting, but
I do, and it seems to be the sort of thing that creates a sustainable career,
something I had hoped for back in the day.
I would
like to think that I have that ability – to purr in that manner, but I’m afraid
my vocal cords are too damaged and therefore my instrument too unreliable. My voice simply exhausts so much easier these
days. And with all my sinus issues, it’s
so nasal, so ugly. It’s why I have given
up singing in public and one of the reasons I’ve turned my back on the theatre.
I
recently had the horrible experience of sitting down and watching a taped
performance of my last foray in the theatre.
My boyfriend wanted to see it. I
sat and cringed the whole time, as it was the first time I had sat through
it. My voice, my choices… ugh. I hated everything about my performance. The only thing I had going for me was I was
loud and energetic and kept things moving toward the end.
That
last thing? Moving the show toward the
end? Yeah, that was probably the only
thing the audience appreciated about my performance, too.
Have an affair and your partner catches you
or he has an affair and you catch him?
I’d
rather catch the boyfriend.
At this
point, I can’t imagine having an affair or a relationship with someone
else. I mean, that could happen… I don’t
know what the future holds. The
boyfriend could decide that we’re not what he had in mind, or something,
sending me packing.
But for
me, this is it. I don’t see myself going
anywhere or wanting anything more.
That
certainly was not the case in the past.
But that was all about sex and exploration, as I avoided any and all
emotional attachment in those situations.
If the
boyfriend cheated on me – and I don’t have any reason to think that he would –
I would be hurt, but, perhaps, not very surprised. I mean, men are men… we simply crave things
that aren’t ours and we always wonder what we might be missing. Also, for some, sex is merely a physical act,
which is something I more than understand.
But that is also maybe a lie we tell ourselves because we don’t want to
risk more.
I think
it’s a lie I told myself.
I
thought I was above it: emotional attachment.
I thought I could exist quite happily keeping everything casual, fun and
temporary. But now that I’m on this side
of things, I must confess, that horribly romantic, and dare I say, emotionally
needy adolescent still lives inside me – and requires sustenance and care.
Now,
the adult in me can keep him in his place, and the adult me can analyze and
rationalize and explain away and accept the behavior of others – something the
adult in me has to do in order to protect that rather damaged adolescent. But that adolescent still yearns for all the
things that a young heart yearns for, and it has been rather cruel of me to
starve him all these years.
It’s a strange relationship – but at some
point, and maybe this is true for all of us – at some point I had to become my
own parent. And part of being a good
parent is making sure the child has all his basic needs met and that includes
his emotional needs.
Which
is why, I suspect, I would be rather forgiving if the boyfriend did cheat on
me.
You
have to be understanding when it comes to the behavior of another person’s
child. As a parent, the only thing you
can be responsible for and have a modicum of control over is your own child.
I’m now
trying to be a good parent. I think we
all should.
Better
parenting yields happier children.
Have better sex or more money?
Oh,
better sex, please. I mean, the sex I am
having is great, but I love those ‘over the moon’ moments – you know, the kind
of swoon one can achieve without a bottle of poppers shoved under your
nostril.
Money? Eh. I
see how much value people place on it and I simply can’t relate. I am unimpressed by wealth, or flash, or
bling, or artifice. It’s boring. Anybody can have that stuff. It’s just crap – future landfill. It means nothing and to thirst and strive for
money so you can have supposed power or acquire things? What an empty melon of a world that person
lives in. How sad.
I feel
bad for celebrities who are so far removed from being actual flesh and blood
people. Their values are shite. They live such wasted lives. Their lives are nothing but a distraction.
And sorry to go there, but when I think of that stupid wedding that Kanye West
and that prostitute of his laid out for the world to sort of witness… that’s not love. That whole thing is so devoid of any human
emotion – human kind should be ashamed that we hold value in such
nonsense.
I
certainly don’t wish them ill, but I do wish that life would remind them of
what it is to be human. What a waste of
a life.
Which
is also what I think of the pursuit of money and fame these days: what a waste
of a life.
Be able to read everyone's mind all the time
or always know the future?
Read
minds, of course.
In a
way, I believe I already can. I’m super
intuitive and empathetic when it comes to the human condition. It’s very rare that someone’s overall
motivation remains a secret to me. I
suss it out, like a detective.
One of
my strengths as a director and acting coach was my ability to understand what
makes people tic. At times, that felt
very manipulative on my part, and I think that is one of the reasons I stopped
directing. Any actor worth working with
has a bit of, well; I’ll term it ‘damage’.
And sometimes opening Pandora’s Box turned out to be a matter where the
ends didn’t justify the means.
But
even in business, I have the ability to see all sides of an issue and take in
account their personalities and personal motivations. Then I play devil’s advocate, in an effort to
get everyone on the same page. It’s a
painful way to work with people… I mean, sometimes you simply want to (and need
to) put your foot down or be horribly blunt.
But I
find people generally like it much better when they come to see a certain point
of view on their own – you know, with a little help.
As for
knowing the future. Ugh. That would take all the fun out of
everything, wouldn’t it? Unless you
could alter the future. But that would
prove to be not a great deal of fun either.
It would be like cheating life.
As Baby
James once sang: “The secret of life is enjoying the passage of time.”
Your partner has sex with someone else or
falls in love with someone else?
Have
sex. Sex is just sex. Save the love for
me!
Bonus
What one thing, big or small, would you
change in your life if granted one wish by a lamp-bound genie?
That’s
a hard question. If I changed anything, I would want to change a lot of things.
So, I
think I will keep everything as is, because I don’t know how my story ends yet.
And I
really feel the need to find out what happens.
Me? I’m hoping for something good!
Have a
great weekend!
1 comment:
I can only think of one thing I could've done differently - and would if I had the chance. Other than that, of the things I had control over, I think I made fine choices.
I let my inner child see the outside quite often. That child is happy and healthy and smiling and laughing.
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