Wonderland Burlesque's Back To School, Fool Quiz - Part II

Wonderland Burlesque's

Back To School, Fool Quiz - Part II

Second verse, same as the first...

All the little rugrats are back in classrooms where they belong and the streets are safe once more. We can return to our public parks, our favorite coffee shop, and the local library without fear.

As with last week's quiz, today, we look back on our own illustrious school careers, hitting every topic I could think of. So, here are another six topics to tackle.

Today? You get to grade yourself. College? High School? Grade School?

How did you do? What are your current skills?

Did you have a favorite teacher in that given subject? Perhaps one who inspired/one who frightened?

Let's take it one topic at a time!

--- ---

1/ Social Studies

I think every lousy teacher I had in high school taught Social Studies. All three were men and they each either had a weak spot or were absolute dicks. 

I learned nothing from them. I can't even tell you what the classes were about. Government? 

Isn't that funny? That I haven't a clue? But I remember the teachers well. 

It seems we may have had a bit of debate in the class I was in my junior year. The future valedictorian of our class, a good friend of mine, was there. We'd circle our desks and he would take one side of an issue - he was very well spoken, and I would purposely take the opposite viewpoint. 

It was frequently about things in the news, which I never watched - so I would have no idea what I was talking about. But when my friend spoke I would pepper him with gotcha! comments and questions. He found me quite annoying, and well should he; I was a bit of a pip.

But other than that? 

I don't know what I learned.

So, unsurprisingly, my senior year, in the last semester of my year as a high school student, I got my one and only C plus...

...in social studies.  

2/ Phys Ed/Health

Oh, I had a time of it. 

First, I was a bit of a late bloomer. 

I'd spent years fighting off my older brother and failing miserably. I hated organized sports. The only ones I was interested in weren't offered at my high school.

Yes. I played basketball for three seasons and sucked at it. Yes, I ran the two-mile for the track team, but only so I could get a letter for my school jacket. And that was it. 

Today? I would probably have gone out for track fulltime. I loved running. And I would have hit the weight room, too. Today.

But then? What an uncoordinated sad little man I was. It was a pass/fail course, so all I had to do was cooperate and not cry. It was mandatory for 7th, 8th, and 9th grade. 

It was mandatory for sixth grade, too... but I didn't want to shower with the other boys, so I would go hide in the library. I was a great library helper, re-shelving books. But then the phys ed teacher caught on and I had to attend. It was awful. 

So, no... I did not like phys ed. Now? I think I might. 

The one thing we did do each year was dance. There was a week when the girls joined us and we learned to dance with them. I already knew what I was doing, so I had a ball. My waltz was the best of the bunch. 

And I did like the obstacle course in the gym. That was a team thing and it was the only time I enjoyed being part of one. 

3/ Shop Class/Home Economics

Boys had to take shop. 

We worked with acrylics and wood working and metal bending/welding. 

I was awful at all of it. Which is odd, because I grew up doing arts and crafts - for Boy Scouts, and making puppets, and just filling time during the summer months. 

But I was never good at any of it. Always used too much glue. Not patient enough with the sandpaper. Couldn't get the glass cutter to work. I made some nice candles, though. 

As for shop? Made a metal tool box with a hinge and latch. Acrylic icicle ornaments. A pair of wooden cranes to be hung on a wall. An acrylic molded spoon rest that resembled a turtle. Acrylic key chains. It was dumb stuff. 

I did alright. But the shop teacher hated me. 

4/ Art

I always did well in art class. I could sort of draw. My horses were beautifully shaded. And I did a very nice portrait of Vicki Lawrence. I think it was supposed to be Helen Reddy, because it's her peach chiffon gown that Vicki is wearing... but I got Helen's face all wrong, so that's when I decided it was Vicki Lawrence. 

I got very much into making clay pots on the wheel. Nothing fancy. Nothing thin. Big, thick pots. I would come in after school and work on things. That was very nice of the art teacher to let me. That way I didn't have to go home. But all my pots were awful. He would let me glaze and fire them anyway. 

I never did improve. 

I think art class is the reason I love pop art graphics so much. Or, graphics in general. 

5/ Chorus/Band/Music

Oh, dear. 

I did it all. Everything I could qualify for, I did. I think music was my thing. 

In high school, even though I was not that talented, I still won class musician at the senior awards banquet. There were two others, who I worked with a lot, who were both more deserving, but, I think because I always participated in every solo contest, every talent contest, every jazz band, glee club, whatever... I really thought life was a variety show - like The Helen Reddy/Paul Lynde/Hudson Brothers Flower Power Hour. 

All I wanted to do was sing, play piano, play my baritone, take voice lessons, write songs, arrange music, dance, and entertain. Acting fell in there, too... but only because I wanted to be like the Carol Burnett Show. 

It never occurred to me to think about it in terms of making money. I was absolutely clueless.

The fortunate thing was, back in my day, it was all included. There were no fees. It was all free. The only thing I ever paid for was piano lessons. 

Thank goodness for that.

6/ Performing Arts: Speech/Theatre/Dance

In college I became very serious about acting and dancing. And smoking cigarettes. 

It was awful. Awful pretentious. 

But then, I was also deeply depressed for the bulk of my first two years in college. But back then, no one recognized it as such. I remember reaching out to a counselor in the admissions office and they acted as if I was typhoid Mary. 

I never reached out again.

I had no one to talk to. So, I just threw myself into my acting and dancing. The more lost in it I became the less I had to deal with myself. 

I never ate. I just smoked cigarettes.

It did not end well, but I did manage to escape to Minneapolis before hurting myself too badly.

And speech? In high school I excelled in storytelling. I won quite a few awards, but not the one I wanted... that one I missed by one point. 

I think storytelling is the reason I like to write.

--- ---

And that's enough of me.

Your turn. You know what to do; leave your answers in the comments section or post on your blog and leave a link here.

Until next time...

Thanks for reading... and participating!

Tell Me A Story - 1927

The Story - Brandi Carlile

Acquired Tastes XLIII Gay Pulp Fiction, Part 119: Adonis Classics, Part 3 of 25

Acquired Tastes XLIII 

Gay Pulp Fiction, Part 119

Adonis Classics, Part 3 of 25

Greenleaf Classic Books, the publishers of  the Adonis Classics imprint, began in 1959 and continued until 1971, when management lost focus on the business as the government's prosecution for obscenity became a major concern.

By 1974,a new management team and staff were in place, operating out of an office at 7523 Raytheon Road in San Diego and production ceased on all existing imprints. In an attempt to break into mainstream markets, two new imprints were started which used cover art and titles that were not provocative. These efforts failed.

The year 1975 marks the end of  Greenleaf Classics' Vintage period. It is at this time, with the loosening of censorship laws, that the Adonis Classics imprint began production. It marks the end of Greenleaf Classic's Classic Age (1959-1975.) 

Adonis Classics would release a total of 252 titles during it's lifespan. 

The first twenty covers feature white backgrounds (with one exception) and colored drawings or black and white pencil illustrations. After the first two titles, a particular type-face was established, with the title appearing above the illustration. The distinctive Adonis Classics symbol was established with either the seventh or eighth title in the series.

After the first twenty titles, the imprint switched to their iconic red covers (though sometimes pink,) featuring a black and white illustration framed in a black circle which has an arrow attached - a universal sign designating something as 'male.' The book's title at the top of the cover is encased in a white circle with an arrow (the symbol for male.)

Today, we'll take a look at another ten titles, eight of which I was able to find covers for.

S/M Stud

Author: Kurt Kimble

AC 121 

I'm not sure what the difference is between the red and the pink versions. If you know, leave it in the comments section and I'll share it next week. Second printing? Different market? Different country?

The nice thing about this new format? There is more than one figure in the illustration. You see, I couldn't understand how I had nothing to say about the first twenty covers. Typically, I grab onto something I notice in the illustration and riff on it. But that's difficult when it's a lone figure because... there's no story. With two figures in the literal picture? There's a relationship, something happening, a setting... and that's just enough to create a story. Perhaps the publishers came to realize this as well, and that is the reason for the change? Potential buyers had to be intrigued enough by the possibility of what they observed in the illustration on the cover that they would actually buy the book. The illustration is the lure. I think that's at the root of my initial interest in gay vintage pulp fiction - the covers drew me in.

Available as a pdf or e-book at Hommi Publishing.

--- ---

Trucker Sucker

Author: Lambert Wilhelm

AC 122 

Sorry about the tiny-sized graphic, but this is the best I could do. I'm having trouble finding some of these covers. Fortunately, William Maltese (Lambert Wilhelm) has an old website still up and accessible and he has a list of books he's written with an example of their covers. Unfortunately, he for some reason decided to make them very tiny scans with poor pixel quality, so... this is what you get.

Still? Better than nothing!

--- ---

Chopper Boy

Author: Kurt Kimble

AC 123 

The date in the corner of the cover is February 1976. I mention that so that you get a sense of how quickly the churn out product. 

The publisher is still playing it fairly safe with the cover art - no frontal nudity. But then, I think mere suggestion is sometimes far more effective than a blatant display. Take this cover, for example: A well-placed, filled-out crotch speaks volumes and helps fuel a potential buyer's imagination. 

Available as a pdf or e-book at Hommi Publishing.

--- ---

B&D Boys 

Author: Lambert Wilhelm

AC 124

B&D stands for bondage and discipline (do you believe I had to Google it!)

Again, a well-placed crotch takes center focus. Quite effective. And that looks to be quite the potential work out. 

I don't think they offer this class at my gym. 

Available as a pdf or e-book at Hommi Publishing.

--- ---

Stable Boys

Author: Kurt Kimble

AC 125 

(Cover Not Found)

Aww. I love horses. And the notion of horny stable boys. 

I think that's what fueled Madonna's obsession with equestrian-themed bondage.

--- ---

Brother Gay

Author: Curt McLean

AC 126

Ah, the seduction of a holy man.

The Catholic Church I last attended had a group of 'brothers' in residence. I sang with a couple of them in the choir and got to know them a bit. Let's just say... they gave off the weirdest vibes. I could never tell what was going on between us. In the end? I just began to avoid them, as I'd heard rumors and I was not going to get involved, as I had enough weirdness in my life to deal with as it was. 

Available as a pdf or e-book at Hommi Publishing.

--- ---

Leather Bound

Author: Lambert Wilhelm

AC 127 

I'm a vegetarian, but I do like leather. I no longer buy it or wear it, but I do love the smell of it, especially when warmed by some hunky man flesh. I've mentioned before how much I loved having sex on leather sheets... I couldn't get over how they just absorbed everything. 

Looking back, from this day and age of Covid-19 and Monkey Pox? 

It kind of loses its 'sexy.'

--- ---

Brother In Bondage

Author: Lambert Wilhelm

AC 128 

My older brother used to tie me up all the time. I hated it so much. And he was so mean. 

I do wonder how such interactions end up shaping our future sexual picadilloes. The idea of it grosses me out, but that sort of imprinting does happen. 

I experimented a little with bondage. I was almost always the one getting tied up. But that all ended after a dude tied me all up and then stood in the corner and smoked some crack. Yeah, it took a little acting on my part, but I eventually convinced him that I was having an allergic reaction to the fabric softener he used on his sheets and he let me go. 

As Whitney used to say in the day... crack is whack. 

--- ---

Well Hung

Author: Damon Marks

AC 129

(Cover Not Found)

I used to be a bit of a size queen. Oh, don't get me wrong, I still find the big ones impressive, but not all that useful - unless I'm in a certain mood (and that is happening less and less these days.)

Still, the sight of a big one at the prairie makes my heart soar. But it's unlikely that I would do anything with it other than smack it around. 

That's where handy-j's come in... er... handy! 

--- ---

Billy In Bondage 

Author: Kurt Kimble

AC 130

Well, it's nice to see they're getting a bit more creative with their titles. This one came out in May 1976. I do not find whipping sexual at all; there's a big disconnect in my mind when it comes to the two. The whole pain and pleasure thing? I get, in theory... but, for me, there are limits. Back in the days when I was still playing with a dude I call Mr. Fister - he would push those limits a lot (and was just devilishly handsome enough to get away with it.) But even then, our play was more degradation than punishment. 

Pain for pain's sake? Not my thing. Not even watching it. 

Available as a pdf or e-book at Hommi Publishing.

--- ---

And that's all for now.

Next week, another ten Adonic Classics.

Until then...

Thanks for reading!

Oh Bondage, Up Yours! - X-Ray Spex

Sunday Diva/Three From The Hip: Jewel

Sunday Diva/Three From The Hip: 

Jewel

In my own, personal, big gay church, there is a wing dedicated to Those of the Heart. These are the singers, songwriters and muses who have spent a lifetime capturing various aspects of the human condition. Frequently, due to the whims of the music industry, their lives were not always their own... but they persevered... ultimately remaining true to their roles as seers of the heart. 

One such kind soul?

Jewel.

Has there ever been a singer so sincere? 

She burst upon the scene in 1995, as fresh and innocent as a newborn fawn. 

Waif-like, with a voice that modulates from a whisper to a storm.

Having come from nothing - once homeless, living in a van - she has always appreciated the gifts life has given here. 

She's shared her wisdom in song and poetry and experimented with a number of musical styles along the way. 

Folk. Pop. Dance. Country. She's tried them all on, successfully.

Fame, marriage, motherhood, divorce... she speaks candidly of all she's experienced.

To this day, she remains as vital and inspiring an artist as when she first appeared.

The gospel according to her? 

Well, here are three from the hips, dropping from her lips.

The topic? Being Broken

"I wrote a line in a song once: “We are never broken.” I believe that truly. It is a hard-earned belief, and rose out of many years of experiencing the opposite. I believe we forget who we are over time, and in our state of forgetfulness we struggle and employ all kinds of learned behaviors that don’t necessarily help us or bring us happiness. Each of us has a self that exists undamaged and whole, from the moment we are born, waiting to be reclaimed. My life has not been about fixing what is broken. It has been about engaging in a loving and tender archaeological dig back to my true self."

"And believing that we are broken is the same as being broken. It means we experience ourselves that way. That perception shapes our reality. It is an illusion we must strive to avoid, as great misery comes from such a belief."

"Betrayal converts our innocence to wisdom if we can let go of pain, bitterness, and fear and create enough self-love and safety for ourselves to allow it to do so."

"My innocence is not lost—it has been converted into wisdom. The sensation we call "breaking" is the pain that comes from resisting the truth. Life broke parts of me that needed to fall away for me to live an open and truthful life."

Foolish Games - Jewel

Intuition - Jewel

Stay Here Forever - Jewel

And one last parting shot...

"In the end, only kindness matters."

Weekend Onesie: The Tipping Point

Weekend Onesie: 

The Tipping Point

This is a lovely photo of Lake Galena taken by our own, multi-talented Mistress Maddie! I'd asked permission to use it at some future date a long time ago (I hope there was no expiration date.) 

This photo perfectly captures how I feel this time of year.

Powerless to stop autumn's ceaseless march, I now must simply and quietly observe, as seasons change. 

It's not unlike the passing of one's life. 

At some point, we must accept the inevitable passing of time. 

Enjoy all you can.

Breathe deep.

Savor every moment.

- uptonking from Wonderland Burlesque

Seasons Change - Exposé