Weekend Onesie: Why Get A Life, When You Can Have A Hobby?

Weekend Onesie: 

Why Get A Life, When You Can Have A Hobby?

Now that November is here and our thoughts turn to indoor activities, what better time to consider taking up a hobby?

For those of you in need of suggestions, I've gathered a few here.

Be forewarned: this is not for the weak of heart.

And sadly, there's nothing here as fascinating as those video's our dear friend Jimmy used to post of that gentlemen who is obsessed with making homemade dildoes and butt plugs in his wood shop...

But, take a gander... I'm sure you'll find something that pops your cork.

Here's to keeping those idle hands busy.

Mine are currently occupied, holding aloft my martini glass.

Well... everyone needs a hobby, darling!

- uptonking from Wonderland Burlesque

Remember pantyhose? Remember when it was a mandatory item in many a company's HR employee handbook under the appropriate dress for work guidelines?

This is a classic. And so very clever. 

Now, I'm all for recycling... but, please? Do rinse well before getting started.

Create a family. One that will never leave you.

Just imagine... if someone had given Jeffrey Dahmer this book in his teens, all those poor boys would still be with us.

Though this does bring up something to keep in mind; when selecting a hobby: do think of those who will have to deal with your 'things' once you pass from this mortal coil. 

More pantyhose fun.

Hmm. They left out the word 'terrifying'.

That center one is a nightmare waiting to happen.

Missing the Queen Mum? 

Well... now she can live in your home forever.

Punch? Really? Huh. I suppose.

I mean, if someone handed me one of these as a gift, some type of response would be warranted. 

Now, you needn't limit your materials to those manmade. 

Turn to nature. 

She's used to creating abominations.

There's a woman in my neighborhood who does this and decorates her front yard with them. 

They're nice, though I doubt she'll ever have her own retrospect at The Walker Art Center. But... then again?

If you're looking for something you can do with your pet, here's an idea. 

Of course, it will help if you have a cat. 

For those of you who feel the need to take pet ownership very, very seriously.

Another means of recycling. A great use for those plastic bleach bottles!

Decorate your entire abode, and be the envy of your friends!

(Ha! What friends?)

For those of you who like to go the organic route. 

Oddly enough, this is not the only use for corncobs that junior came up with.

Yet another creative repurposing. 

Safety pin manufacturers love this book.

Why be content with making art when you can create things that can become part of your everyday life?

Just go to the store and buy a bunch of duct tape. That way, you won't have to go to the store to buy something like, oh, say... a wallet.

I'm not sure if the fashion world is ready for these next few suggestions. 

But a mini-skirt made of duct tape? Worthy of a RuPaul's Drag Race challenge!

Not as P.C. as it once was, I'm afraid. 

But, at least this way one is certain to accessorize appropriately while transitioning. 

Because going to a store or ordering on-line is sooooo much work!

These gals appear to be battle-ready!

Sherpa? Or The Grim Reaper?

Only that llama knows for sure.

Tie dye! Fringe vests! Leathercraft! Macramé'!

Great and groovy, indeed!

Yes, darlings... take it to the club!

Make all those other bitches look like the store bought crap they are!

Shout out to our dear friend, Jon Across The Pond, at Give 'Em The Old Razzle Dazzle for this one!

Like many a horror film, making it 3-Dimensional? 

Makes it sillier, not better.

I wonder... how many of these would it take to get to the moon and back?

Something tells me there are enough leftover from the 1970's to do just that.

Is there anything more terrifying than... a friendship bracelet?

Re: the above question? Asked and answered!

For those of us of like minds.

Quite frankly, I can't think of anything more sinister than giving a homemade arts and crafts project as a gift. 

That'll teach 'em!

Yikes! Man, I'd hate to see the 'Sad' or 'Terrifying Book Of Little Gifts!

Yes, but after you make it, what else is one to do with it?

Hmm. Always an agenda with these people...

Lacking a green thumb? 

Don't let that stop you from having a garden of your own.

Nice thing about this type of garden? No weeds.

Because mother nature can't be trusted...

Hmm. Screw wood working... I think I just found an easier way of making a butt plug.

Apparently this is a family affair.

Imagine stewing in that delicious juice?

(I, for one, will not be attending.)

For those of you with more practical needs. 

This could qualify as a hobby. But then again, so could murder. 

Ragnar Benson has a whole line of  books outlining helpful household hints.

He also has an FBI file thicker than War And Peace.

For those of you who can't be bothered with actually 'doing' anything.

And for those of us who were born totally void of any skills whatsoever.

This? This I could do.

Well, now you have something to put in that paper bag...

...before setting it on the porches of your enemies and setting it on fire.

This is really rather meta, isn't it? I mean, what are arts and crafts but human manure?

Arts And Crafts - Red Light Company