Wonderland Burlesque's Mere Seconds Quiz, Part I

Wonderland Burlesque's 

Mere Seconds Quiz, Part I

What a versatile word: second. But then, if you're not number one, I guess you'd have to be flexible.

Today is all about seconds... and I came up with so many possible questions it naturally led to a second quiz. This is the first of two.

I've grabbed phrases from our common vernacular and assigned a definition, so you'll know what we're looking for. Some of these are quite simple, while others will require a bit of thought; hope your memory is in good shape.

Well, it seems seconds are passing as we speak, so let's get right to it!

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1/ Second To No One: Who is the number one person in your life. 

The Boyfriend

I think I'd do just about anything on his behalf, as he is a kind soul and would never ask I do something terrible. I have a number of people in my life who mean a great deal to me, but if it came down to it... I'd choose him. 

I am the center of my universe, but the world wouldn't mean a great deal to me without him.

Those that don't get it? Well, I don't feel the need to explain. It simply is. He makes me very happy and I appreciate every moment I get to spend with him.

2/ Second Helpings: Name a food that you can't help but eat more of.

Mashed Potatoes

I adore them so much. I am ever so happy when I discover someone has made too much for a given event - because that means I get to have more. And if there is one word that goes together with mashed potatoes... it is 'more.' 

Fortunately, there are enough vegan and vegetarians in my family now that mashed potatoes are always made without dairy. I tell you... I don't miss it. Mashed potatoes taste great without it. And because it's dairy-free... I get to eat all I like!

3/ Second Hand: Name something you were given second hand that you adore.

The Boyfriend gave me his Black+Decker rice maker. I adore that thing. It makes perfect rice every time. Twenty minutes. You set it up and let it do its thing. When it clicks back to 'warm,' just unplug it and add whatever you're having that night. Clean up is a breeze and it's easy to store. 

I used to hate making rice. It would boil over. You had to watch it. It was a pain in the ass.

Now? Its so easy. I use it once a week. Best thing that ever happened to my stove top.

4/ Second Chances: Tell me about a person you gave a second chance to.

It's very rare that someone every comes back. Typically, once they've had enough of me, it remains that way for life. 

But, just recently an old friend from Target has reappeared on the scene. After being shut out of his life for almost 20 years, the door has cracked open again. And I am all on board. I have missed him. If he's willing to give me a second chance? Then ditto. 

We exchanged numbers and have texted about getting together for happy hour. We'll see. Not holding my breath, as it has been a week now since I suggested it and he accepted - though we never set a time and date. 

Who knows. Could happen. Would be nice to have him as a friend again.

5/ The Second Time Around: Name a song where you like the remake better than the original.

As those of you who have spent anytime reading this blog know; I love me a cover version of a song.  So this is a tough one for me.

Always On My Mind by The Pet Shop Boys springs to mind. As does Twist In My Sobriety by Liza Minelli (and produced by PSB). As does Soft Cell's Tainted Love.  

But, are you ready? 

I'm going with two covers by Barbra Streisand. They appear on her Butterfly album, an overlooked treasure in her musical history. First? David Bowie's Life On Mars. Glam, it is not. Coming out of the diva's mouth it becomes a full-fledged panoramic musical number. It's dramatic and so much fun. The other? Graham Nash's Simple Man. Her version breaks my heart - for I first heard it the first time I broke someone's heart. It was our song. And I will never forget the first time I saw him from 'across the room.'

6/ The Second Coming: What are your thoughts about the return of 'Christ?'

I hope he brings potato salad.

Really? At this point, I don't see how anybody believes any of this crap, but... whatever. To each their own. 

We all need a mythology to live. I find it unfortunate that those who most fervently believe are also the ones treating others in a manner that 'he' probably wouldn't approve of, but then... that seems to be the nature of organized religion and religious zealots, to behave in a manner that runs contrary to their expressed beliefs.

7/ Second Best: Name a time you were a runner-up.

To this day I am sad that I didn't get the chance to play Algernon in The Importance Of Being Earnest.

I came so close, having made final callbacks. It was between me and this other actor I knew quite well, whom, I must say, was completely wrong for the part. However, my blood sugar or something went bad just as we began the callback. I felt physically awful, as if all my energy was being sucked into the floor, and was having to fight through it. At one point, the director, whom I didn't know at all, pulled me aside and told me that what he needed to see was more of what I had done in the first round of auditions. He didn't understand what was going on. I just nodded my head and told him I knew what he wanted. I couldn't tell him I didn't feel good... that's just not done; no director wants to hear an excuse, especially when you don't even have the role. 

So, I struggled through it - scene after scene - and lost. It was a frustrating evening. 

And, of course, I went opening night. The other actor was serviceable, but not right. At intermission, I saw the director and he gave me some sad puppy eyes. I'm pretty sure we were both thinking the same thing. 

8/ In A Hot Second: Tell me about a man that makes your panties drop.

Any. 

Wait. Is that an acceptable answer? No.

I do develop short term 'crushes' at the drop of a hat, though. Almost any man I see I try to visualize what it would be like to get naked with them. It's a fairly harmless form of self-entertainment. I mean, yes, I'm objectifying them and getting them to do nasty things without their consent, but then... it's all in my head. I'd never act on any of it. Well, rarely. 

I like real men. Men who live in their bodies. Men who accept themselves and have a sense of humor about themselves. You don't have to be a gym bunny... you just have to be kind.

And very real. 

So, no porn stars, okay?

These days? As far as celebrities go, I still have a thing for Ernie Lee. Not back in the days of Ghostbusters, but today. The man has aged like a fine wine. 

One I would love a sip of. 

9/ In A Matter Of Seconds: Tell me about a time your life turned on a dime.

The day I looked up from the shop floor, where I was seated, working on a flat, and my eyes met the eyes of a certain actor. It was winter and the shop door, which was a garage door, was wide open, so he was backlit with this bright white light. It was the most magical, romantic moment I have ever experienced. I was seventeen years-old and at that moment I could have died so happily. That moment set off a chain of events that would drastically alter how I viewed the world  and who I was to become. 

I was never the same. 

It took me years to reconcile it all.

But it was that moment. Dumbstruck. Take my breath away... 

I never knew what hit me... and I never saw it coming.

10/ I Second That Emotion: Tell me about a celebrity who you know exactly how they feel.

Madonna

Go ahead. Laugh. Scoff. But it's true. 

She's now 64. She did the climb. She stayed on top. She kept changing and evolving and defying. She tried sex and religion and motherhood and charity work. She's worked her body and her mind and, even with her somewhat limited voice, has managed to astound the world time and again. Visually? Who can touch her? So much of what we see today stems from things she first created. 

But what I really get is... she's all about herself. Her art. She doesn't think of life in any other terms. She's experienced enough and learned enough and absorbed enough that she isn't listening to anyone else these days. She's myopic; a sort of tunnel vision which doesn't allow room for advice from others. 

It's very isolating. And lonely. And singular. Like a laser beam. 

She's working hard to expand and preserve her legacy. She's working hard to preserve her body.

It's anti-social. And I don't think she can help it. 

Look. There were four talents exploding about the same time. Earth shakers. George Michael bailed first. And he could never cope. Michael Jackson became this travelling freak show and that ended in disaster. Even Prince, who was sort of above it, ended up in the same boat as George and Michael.

Madonna is the only one still with us. 

Consider the madness those three men I mentioned dealt with in their own way. Look how they ended.

But, Madge is still very much here. She's still creating. Madame X was a brilliant disaster, the kind of artistic train wreck no one else could have possibly created. She's not content to fill up the dance floor these days. She's taking her art very seriously. Is it beyond her average fan's comprehension? Yes. Decidedly, so. But, at this point, she doesn't care if you don't come along for the rest of her journey. This isn't about creating a fan base, or pandering, or remaining popular - she's done all that against all odds and beat those odds time and again. 

No. She's Picasso. She's Frida Kahlo. 

And she no longer cares if we 'get it.' She 'gets it.' 

And that's all that matters.

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And that's enough of me!

Okay, your turn. You know what to do: leave your answers in the comments section or post it on your blog and leave a link here. I do enjoy learning a little more about you week after week.

Until next time...

Thanks for reading... and participating. 

10 Seconds - Jazmine Sullivan

Second Chance - 38 Special