Wonderland Burlesque's Mere Seconds Quiz, Part II

Wonderland Burlesque's

Mere Seconds Quiz, Part II

What a versatile word: second. But then, if you're not number one, I guess you'd have to be flexible.

Today is all about seconds... and I came up with so many possible questions it naturally led to a second quiz. This is the second of two.

I've grabbed phrases from our common vernacular and assigned a definition, so you'll know what we're looking for. Some of these are quite simple, while others will require a bit of thought; hope your memory is in good shape.

Well, it seems seconds are passing as we speak, so let's get right to it!

1/ A Second Look: Name a fashion you initially despised, but have come to appreciate.

I have not been on board with the whole sleepwear as daywear.

I remember when kids started wearing lounging pajamas in public. I was aghast. I had a niece who embraced the trend hard. She'd show up to a family event looking like a hobo - pajama bottoms and dirty slippers - and I just wanted to take her aside and say, 'my dear, this simply won't do.' 

Nine years ago, when I met the boyfriend and started hanging out with him, he had these lounging bottoms - they were fuzzy blue with the characters from Adventure Time - Finn and Jake The Dog. I initially resisted, but... one winter morning, I was cold and feeling lazy, so I put them on. Next thing I knew? I claimed them as 'mine' and have been wearing them on Saturday and Sunday mornings, ever since. 

I would never wear them in public. 

Although, I have walked out of the house still wearing my slippers on more than one occasion. 

And onesies? Well, that is where I draw the line... although??

Union suits and long johns? Yes, please!

2/ Second Hand: Tell me about something you adore that you purchased at a thrift shop .

There was an old upright traveling piano from the 1890's which had the most wonderful sound and soul. It had a full harp and came apart for easy transport. When I moved to Iowa, it did not come with. I left it with the ex. 

A year and a half later, the ex sold his house and the piano went with the house. Five years later, the house is torn down as part of a hospital expansion. 

While I do hope they had the good sense to donate or move it...

I fear it 'went' with the house. 

3/ Second Base: Tell me about your first time touching someone sexually above the waist.

This is embarrassing.

When I was a wee thing, I stayed over at my female cousin's house for an overnight. She lived on a horse farm and we decided to sleep in this little shed next to the main barn... sort of like we were camping. We stayed up all night talking. What we had to talk about at that age? I haven't a clue. Just before dawn, she took her pajama top off so I could feel her 'boobies.' Then we climbed up on the roof of the shed and watched the sun come up. 

We never spoke of it. But remained close. 

She was recently diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer's. 

When I saw her next, I told her that the amazing thing about memories are, even when we lose ours, they live on in others. I asked her to not be afraid, for she will always be taken care of. 

4/ Second Guessing: Tell me about a time when you changed your initial decision and almost immediately regretted it.

I took on a production of Funny Thing Happened On The Way To The Forum. It was the same theatre where I had a great success with a production of Arsenic And Old Lace and they loved me there. It meant a long daily commute, but I thought, 'hey, I can do this.' They'd been kind enough to play host for two of my touring productions - Crimes Of The Heart (which went over well) and 'Night, Mother (which did not.)(Too sad.)

I was in the process of auditions. I liked the pianist I'd be working with, but had serious reservations about the assistant director I'd been assigned. She was a board member, one who was always stirring up trouble. The rest of the board all warned me. But, I'd worked with her before and thought I could handle her.

I was wrong. 

She was on me from moment one - telling me this person was okay, this person would never do. She was pushy and I can't even tell you the exact moment the straw landed that broke the camel's back, but I was just finishing up with an audition with a young couple who were perfect for Hero and Philia and was walking them out of the theatre when she said something in front of them that embarrassed and infuriated me. Right in front of them, I turned and let the woman have it... lasers on full blast. 

I quit on the spot. 

I told her I'd have no more of her unhelpful suggestions. That if she wanted to control my every move, and second guess my every choice, then she could just direct the show herself. Then I told her to be careful, or one day she'd be left standing all alone in that big empty theatre because no one wanted to work with her.

And I walked across the street to a bar, where the rest of the board of directors were sitting and told them I'd quit. They told me they didn't blame me. But later... they did.

The divide was there long before I'd come on the scene, but my quitting was the final straw for most of them and they all quit the board. It was the beginning of the end for the theatre. When that became apparent, I regretted having caused it. I should have simply fired the woman and dealt with the consequences. 

But I was being selfish, too. I didn't relish that commute, not that I couldn't have stayed with one of the board members. But, I'm a very private person and don't really like to stay with others. In the end, it was a reversal I really wish I would have thought through. 

But... I was young. And not very bright.

5/ Second In Command: Name a time when you felt your really ought to be the leader.

There were so many shows when I was cast as second banana to a lead actor that I could act circles around. Sadly, it almost always came down to looks. I'm Ray Bolger. I'm Danny Kaye. I'm Don Knotts. I'm not necessarily your typical romantic lead. So, directors tend to cast me as the best friend of. Or the villain. Oddly, this most frequently happened when doing summer stock. It's as if every director they hired had no sense of originality. They always played it safe and cast the traditionally handsomest guy who walked in - it didn't matter if they had all the personality of a piece of cardboard on stage - they were what the audience was expecting. And so... show after show, I'd sit, growing a little more bitter about the whole thing, as I stood on the side lines and watch some square-chinned gym bunny get the girl. 

Oh, I'd do everything I could to steal the show - and typically succeeded, but still...

I always thought I should have been the lead.  

6/ Counting The Seconds: Name an event you look forward to every year.

Other than Xmas and Thanksgiving and New Years... I look forward to the first day of spring. 

It simply signals the end of that horrible dormancy we experience from January 2nd to March 20th. I literally count the days, like Persephone in the underworld, doing time with Hades. 

If I could turn back time, I'd zero in on the day she ate those pomegranate seeds. 

I'd zap myself in at that exact moment and scream, 'Bitch, get those outta your mouth! Damn, gurl, what you thinkin'?' 

7/ Give Me A Second: Tell me about a time when you needed more time.

Every October 1st. I want more time. I want more summer. I'm not ready to let go. I'm never ready to say good-bye to the warm weather. 

8/ Second To None: Tell me what you feel you are the best at.

I think cutting to the chase. I am an A-Z kind of guy. I don't cotton extra steps for the sake of extra steps. I'm not going to sacrifice quality, but efficiency is my game. 

It's common sense. 

So many people feel the need to include other people in certain decisions and I am the first person to apply the breaks when it comes to mapping out the steps necessary to accomplish a given task. I'm like, just do it. Get it done. Move on. You have more important things to do. We all have more important things to do. 

I don't care that you have a black belt in Sigma Six. This is a straight arrow... do not confuse it with all sorts of diagrams and traffic signs. Fuck that magic. Just... make it happen as simply as possible you fool. 

Where I work? I deal with a lot of over-thinkers. I look at some of what they take on and just shake my head and when they want me to become complicit in their foolishness I never hesitate to say, 'no.' I offer to do it for them or I simply stand aside and allow them to proceed as they wish - without me. I don't have time to satisfy someone's ego or justify all the energy they've expended getting certified in MS Project. Screw that. I don't have hours to play semantics with anyone. 

I just want to do my job... and go home.

9/ Second Thoughts: Tell me about a time or person when after time had passed you look at it or them differently.

Well, there's the ex, Josh - with whom I owned an antique/collectibles shop with. I really screwed that up and made the wrong decision. I proceeded to mess up both our lives, with dire consequences. 

But that's the nature of acting out of hurt. Such poor decisions are the aftermath of betrayal. And it's always the most innocent who take the most damage... never the betrayer. 

It's taken me years and years to see that situation for what it was. And longer to take responsibility for the impact my poor decisions had on others. Back then, I was so hard on myself... and even harder on those around me. I hadn't come to fully appreciate the humor to be found in the grey; for me, everything was as black and white as an old Susan Hayward movie. 

I'm glad that I eventually turned a corner. I'm glad I came to my senses and realized the value of other people and how we must never be careless with them. 

But so many arrived in my life, too early to benefit from that wisdom. 

And we all paid the price... but some paid more.

10/ Seconds Away: Tell me about a time you arrived late and it really cost you.

I love deadlines. I work them like a porn star works their dick. But that's project-oriented. And, if it's something I care about, it gets done, on time, every time. However...

Arriving on time? That took me years and years to learn. I was typically always super early for rehearsals and auditions. But late for real world jobs and family events... like weddings. 

I was running late for my oldest sister's wedding rehearsal, where I was the wedding singer. And, since she was a musician and a music teacher, the music for her wedding was very important (she'd perform two numbers at her own wedding reception!) And, even though she hated my guts, she entrusted that to me. 

I thought if I drove like a bat out of hell, I would make it on time. That simply delayed me more, because a state trooper pulled me over and I was such a stupid kid, I sat and acted super put upon and vented all my frustrations on the trooper. 

Well, good thing my skin is a certain shade, right? 

I got a very expensive ticket and was 30 minutes late, which made my sister hate me even more... it was just another notch toward the inevitable 'never going to speak to you again as long as I live,' which splashed down about two years ago at a funeral where my youngest sister had to tell my oldest that she could not sing graveside because the deceased had specifically requested that she not sing at his funeral. He'd chosen me, instead and that bit of news did was not received well. A big scene ensued, which was heartbreaking, because we were burying our other sister's husband and she really didn't need to witness that little meltdown. 

Ah, family.

These days? I'm never late. Life is short. And people? Precious.

--- ---

And that's enough of me. Man, some of these question really caused me to have to think. 

Okay, your turn. You know what to do. Leave your answers in the comments section, or on your blog and post a link here. 

That's all for now...

Thanks for reading... and participating!

Seconds - Gladys Knight & The Pips

Second To No One - Rosanne Cash