Friday Fun: Happy National Senior Citizens Day!

Friday Fun: Happy National Senior Citizens Day!

I don't know how many of you qualify as a senior citizen. 

At Country Kitchen you can order off the Senior Menu starting at age 55. Same with Denny's.

But typically, the starting age is 60 or 65.  And while some of the models pictured below do not yet qualify... they all will one day. For, if you're fortunate enough, aging is an inevitability. Which seems strange given how rampant ageism is here in the United States.

But then the U.S. seems to view older Americans as expendable - unless they have money and/or power. All too frequently these days I hear stories of corporations that place a target on the backs of employees who are of a certain age. Getting rid of long-term employees is an easy means of getting fresh blood and - most importantly - cheaper labor. Then the bigwigs - who are typically in that same age bracket, but not targeted because they have power and money... can turn to their board of directors and stockholders and tell them how much money their shrewd tactics have saved the company by showing these older workers the door. 

You know what else walks out that door? Tribal knowledge. Put a price on that, you cutthroats of industry. 

And the workplace is not the only culprit when it comes to age discrimination. 

I see it all the time on apps like Grindr. Profiles that openly declare, "No old dudes. Gross." It hurts the heart to read such things. Such a lack of empathy. I take comfort in the thought that, should they live long enough, they will one day become the very thing they despise. (Isn't it ironic? Don't you think?) But the very young are not alone in thinking that way.  

Older men are just as guilty. I remember feeling the sting of one self-declared 'A-Gay' with his terribly dyed spiky boy band hair complete with frosted tips, a spray on tan that made The Housewives of Beverly Hills look positively ghostly, hiding behind a pair of oh-so mod designer frames going on an offensive tirade about how tired he was of creepy old people hitting on him, with their crepe-like skin, deflating asses, aching joints, sagging chests, flaccid, discolored dicks and old man smells. 

I swear, if he had been standing next to me? I would have slapped the cheek implants right outta his fucking pinch-mouthed face. 

Instead, I simply blocked his profile so I wouldn't be tempted to challenge him. Though, more likely, it was so I wouldn't keep re-reading his asinine profile. 

I take issue with people like him. And older men who have age limits set lower than their own age. I also have to chuckle at those who have been '39' for more than a century. 

Ah, yes... only on the internet can we be ageless and evergreen!

Me? I appreciate bodies of all shapes and sizes. Every day, every single one of us is doing our best to defy gravity. All those lines? Those are earned. And they should be celebrated.

Fact is, older men need and deserve sex and love. It's a healthy necessity. Ejaculation helps keep the prostate gland in great shape, not to mention all of the psychological benefits that come when you... cum.

So here's in praise of older men. 

If you're lucky enough to become one... embrace it. Love you're badass self! You've earned it, baby!

Have a marvelous weekend.

Wishing you all the very best.

- Uptonking at Wonderland Burlesque

One Less Day (Dying Young) - Rob Thomas

It Gets Easier - Willie Nelson

(For Jimmy)