Wonderland Burlesque's Let's All Go To The Movies: The Oldest Profession Edition, Part I

Wonderland Burlesque's

Let's All Go To The Movies:

The Oldest Profession Edition, Part I

Ah, when it comes to prostitution, why not go straight to the experts! No one knows how to pimp better than the factory of dreams.

Yes, we all know what Hollywood was really selling, here... tickets!

Let's all take a gander and delve into the seamy underworld that keeps tinsel town percolating... movies!

I'll Sell My Life

(I'd sell mine, but a nickel doesn't buy much these days.)

(Sometimes I offer a two for one deal, but I don't get a lot of takers.)

Street Corner

"The most vital picture of all time."

"Two hours of truths! & Facts!"

"It lifts the iron curtain of fear and ignorance."

(Note the men-only, women-only showings!)

(I want to be outside the theatre when the women's-only let's out to watch the town tramp storm out spouting, "Lies, lies, lies. It's all lies!")

Scarlet Street

"The great stars and director of Woman In The Window"

(I take it Edward G. Robinson is either green with envy, or... he got one hell of an STD!).

Gigolette

(Adore this poster. And I remember Ralph Bellamy and Donald Cook.)

Good Time Girl

(Me, at the prairie, in summer.)

Pickup

"Don't be scared - I'm just a girl..."

"Marrying her was his mistake... Murder was hers!"

(Why marry, when you can rent? Am I right?)

Pickup On South Street

"How the F.B.I. Took a chance on a b-girl ...and won.!"

(I had to look up 'b-girl' and apparently it stands for bar girl; one whom may or may not be working just for 'tips.')

"Not suitable for children."

(Really? I want to meet the parent who wouldn't take the hint provided by the poster art.)

Bait

"...The door's open... come on in!"

"Kisses like these are plenty."

"She's the bait in a mantrap!"

(Huh, for this succeed with me as the bait, it would have to be a case of bait and swish.)

Blonde Bait

"Dangerous Decoy in a game of murder!"

"She's a silken trap that waits in the dark ...waiting for the killer with a gun!"

"...The kind of mistake a man can only make once!"

(But a mistake men are willing to make over and over and again.)

Man Bait

"The cards are stacked... against any man who falls for her kind of..."

"Blonde blackmail!"

(Like we could do a post about this type of movie and not feature one with Diana Dors!)

The Flesh Is Weak

"The newest headlines on the oldest profession!"

"She did anything and everything for his love!"

(I have always fantasized about someone pimping out my ass. But the reality lies so far from the fantasy. Oh, not on my part... the poor johns'! Talk about your bait and switch. It would be a little like thinking you're hiring Rita Hayworth, only to discover you're getting Alice Ghostly.)

Vice Raid

"Syndicate owned sin-center smashed!"

"Phony model agency exposed as b-girl headquarters!"

(Have I had a post about campy movie posters that does not include a film starring Mamie Van Doren? She certainly seems to be giving Diana Dors a run for her money.)

"Big crackdown on call-girl racket!"

(Just imagine the sanitized world these girls inhabited. All muted solid tones and marabou feathers without an ounce of reality to spoil it.) 

Detour

"He went searching for love... but fate forced a detour to: revelry, violence, mystery!"

(Oh! Road trip! With a hooker! Talk about your comedy goldmine. Bet she makes him stop at every truck stop.)

She Walks By Night

"The true story of a woman who made love in the play capitals of the world!"

(I love me a true story, especially when it stars the person it's about. This must be a special film subgenre. Fascinating. I wonder if there a book about the phenom?)

Cry Of A Prostitute

"For a lousy twenty-five bucks some people think they can do anything!"

(Well, there's a downside to any employment. You should see what I gotta do some days to make a buck!)

"Being a hooker never stopped me from being a women."

(This sounds like the tagline for a Revlon ad.)

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That's all we have time for this week. 

Tune in next week!

Same time! Same channel!

Right Now, It's Intermission!