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Tuesday, October 05, 2021

The Privilege Walk Quiz - Part 5 of 5

The Privilege Walk Quiz
Part 5 of 5

Today marks the end of our 'privilege walk.' Only seven questions remain! Explain your answers if you wish. 

Why did I feel the need to do this?

I'd been thinking about privilege long before George Floyd or the Covid crisis. I work with a number of incredibly privileged people, whose sense of entitlement sometimes rubbed me the wrong way. It still does. 

What it caused me to do was to look at my life in terms of the opportunities they were given in this life compared to those in my life - only so I could explain, for myself, why I landed where I landed. 

I have always felt subservient to others... and for the longest time I could not identify the reason that was true. Growing up, I experienced a frustration shared by many of us - I couldn't understand why things came so easily to others, while I struggled. A lot of what I witnessed flew right over my head, as I wasn't aware of there being such a thing as privilege. At that time, privilege was a term reserved for extremely wealthy people, heirs and heiresses, movie stars, rock stars and royalty. It never occurred to me that there were degrees of privilege. 

And that's what is at the heart of this quiz - determining your degree of privilege.

My current situation is far removed from that of my childhood, just as my parents' circumstances ended up much different than their humble beginnings. So privilege is something that does evolve, however, there are things in our past that sometimes prevented us from seizing opportunities that came easily to those whose privilege exceed our own - and that helps to explain why we end up where we find our adult selves.

As we move into adulthood and begin to understand how the world works, the degree to which we control our personal privilege shifts and becomes our responsibility. 

I believe this quiz takes that into account. 

So, this quiz is very individualistic and about gaining awareness. It's not about comparing yourself to someone else. It's not about blaming someone for your situation. It's about coming to understand, in part, why you ended up being the person you are. Yes, there are a number of factors that play into that: genetics, for example, but this quiz is meant to help you define one piece of the puzzle that is 'you.'

Think of it this way; privilege means access; access to education, to potential career paths, to all sorts of opportunities. Sometimes, because of 'where we came from' we end up having a much more difficult time 'getting there.' And sometimes, given one's circumstances? 'There' isn't even on the map. 'There' is a place that isn't possible because it simply does not exist. 

That's the power of privilege. 

And those that were born into it?  Good for them. This is an opportunity for you to become aware of what role such privilege played in your life and be sensitive of the issues faced by those who did not enjoy the same amount of privilege that you have. It may make you aware of something to consider when you interact with others.

Me? I'm still working through this. The struggle and frustration I have experienced on a daily basis still continues, but... I am working on it. My anger, which more and more demands to be addressed, has a source. By identifying it? I believe I can neutralize it. Is that a naïve notion on my part? Perhaps. But having worked through certain traumatic events in my life, I know that coming to terms with those instances is only part of the work I have to do in order to understand why I am the way I am. And I believe that just as empathy leads to understanding leads to acceptance, I also believe that acceptance leads to peace. 

That's what I want. Peace. In myself. I'm tired of the war happening in my head on a daily basis. It's exhausting and getting in the way of the things I would like to accomplish in my lifetime.   

So, here's how the quiz works: it's quite simple: for the purposes of these posts, to avoid confusion, we'll be adding or subtracting points, rather than steps. This week, we get tally up all our points from all 35 questions.

Let's pick up where we left off... with question #29.

29/ If you studied the culture or the history of your ancestors in elementary school, plus one point. If not? Minus one.

I know what this question, on the surface, wishes to address... but that's not the whole story, now is it.

Define 'ancestors.' Are we talking about only those that we are descended from? Because my paternal grandmother was Native America, which is a culture that certainly was never shared in a meaningful, honest way. However, for the most part, I believe my family 'passed' as white. So? Not sure what to make of this. 

Or do we define 'ancestors' as though who came before us? I'm talking gay folk. Those clones on Castro Street? Noel Coward? Oscar Wilde? Alexander The Great? They are all 'my people.'  And no one was talking about them in any meaningful or honest way back in the day. That was all hush-hush. 

So? 

-1
 
30/ If your parents or guardians attended college, plus one point. If not? Minus one.

The only way my father gained his boiler engineering license is thanks to the US Army. And my mother really didn't have the means of attending college, although she tried. That they did as well as they did in life? Rather amazing. 

Let me put this in perspective. I was their third child. When I was born? They were living in a trailer on a lot filled with others in their same boat. And we are not talking about a trailer the size most enjoy today. No. We are talking 14' of space. Think about it. They started a family... had two kids with three on the way, before they actually lived in a real house. I can't imagine. But that is a small example of what my parents had to overcome. It's also an indication of where I 'come from.'

-1

31/ If you ever went on a family vacation, plus one point. If not? Minus one.

Yes. We went on family vacations. Typically camping at Rice Lake State Park, or to visit relatives. We never experienced the kind of destination vacations people enjoy today (we never stayed in a hotel) but we saw our share of monuments. We did go camping in South Dakota once, to see Mt. Rushmore, but then we also went visit one of my Dad's sisters at that time as well. 

+1
 
32/ If you can buy new clothes or go out to dinner when you want to, plus one point. If not? Minus one.

Today, yes! See? Privilege? It evolves. 

Growing up? No. One of our annual family events? My brother and sisters and I would be hired out to a local farmer to pick rocks out of their fields. Whatever money we earned was put aside and then, when McDonalds would run a burger special (19 cents), we would pile into the car and we would all get to eat as much as we wanted. Odd? Yes. But it was a lot of fun. 

Other than that? We never went out to eat. And new clothes? Naw. 

But now? Well, things are lot different. And yes, I do what I want and buy what I want, for the most part.

+1

33/ If you were ever offered a job because of your association with a friend or family member, plus one point. If not? Minus one.

Never lucky enough to have those kind of friends. Not from that kind of family.

-1
 
34/ If one of your parents were ever laid off or unemployed not by choice, minus one point. If not? Plus one.

My father lost two jobs. I don't know what happened at the chemical factory where he worked, but it was a small town and I think he got squeezed out when someone's son wanted his job. 

The other time was something rather monumental. In order to increase access to I-94, the historic Curtis Hotel, which had seen better days by the time my Dad went to work there, was sacrificed to make way for an on ramp. In it's heyday many celebrities stayed at the Curtis. My favorite story involves Judy Garland, who had taken up residency there, but she never paid her bill, so the cops were called to haul her out. As the cops escorted her from the premises and put her in a cab, a greatly disheveled Judy screamed, "Get me outta this ratfuck!"

And that's my favorite quote, ever. 

If I were to have tombstone? That's what I'd want on it.

-1
 
35/ If you were ever uncomfortable about a joke or a statement you overheard related to your race, ethnicity, gender, appearance, or sexual orientation but felt unsafe to confront the situation, minus one point. If not? Plus one.

Sure. All my life. At school. In the theatre. At work. Homophobia.

I currently work for a very progressive company. Super, in fact. That said... like every other company I have worked for there is always 'that one guy' or 'that group' that get away with saying and doing the most outrageous things. Where I currently work? I've had to deal with both.

I've had two run ins with 'that guy.' 

He's so toxic I've actually watched him climb the ladder to become a director of a division only to be busted down (I might have had something to do with that) to principal engineer. Now he's a manager again, but, oddly, is working remotely, having moved to... wait for it... Mississippi! (I'm sure he's very happy there!)  

Also, at one point in my time at this company, I found myself surrounded by Orange Ogre Loving, Jesus Or Die, Anti-Vax, Anti-Government, Anti-Abortion, Anti-Gay Marriage MoFo's. The conversations I was forced to overhear! One conversation turned so graphic and angry that I did say something. I got up and told them their conversation was inappropriate for the workplace and that it needed to stop now. I got stone face and then one of them started asking me questions, which made me even more uncomfortable, so I returned to my cube. I endured that for a year, until I got my latest position and got the hell out of Dodge. 

I'm not a complete coward... but I know when the deck is stacked against me.

Now we're supposed to return to work. And those people are still there and I know none of them will be vaccinated. I dread it.

-1

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And that's all they wrote, folks!


Okay, your turn. Leave your answers in the comments section, along with your final tally.

How to evaluate your score: there were 35 questions, so 35 opportunities. The scale is 35+ to 35- : where did you land?

My final tally: -16

No, I don't think this quiz is perfect. I think there are things they failed to touch on and that some of the questions didn't really get to the heart of a given issue. But it's an interesting and valuable exercise all the same. It promotes awareness, which I think is a step in the right direction.

Thanks for taking this 'walk' with me and for sharing your answers.

Until next time...

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Say Something - Justin Timberlake feat. Chris Stapleton







































































































Say Something - Kylie Minogue 
feat. The House Gospel Choir

7 comments:

Jimmy said...

I didn't keep a running list of ALL the questions. But, Max Seargant is HAWT!!!!!

Sixpence Notthewiser said...

You are right, it's not comparing ourselves to others, it's about gaining insight.
Let's see:
29: It is a tricky question. But I'd say minus one.
30: Only one did. Is that minus 1/2?
31: plus one. I still remember our family vacations. They were fun.
32: plus one. I know. We need to count our blessings.
33: minus one. I'm not a member of the Cheeto family! LOL
34: plus one. I think they both always worked.
35: minus one. More than once.

I'm gonna have to go back and tally my answers.
And I agree with Jimmy! Max Sargent is totally hot. I'd be hot for teacher, too!

XOXO

Bob said...

29/ If you studied the culture or the history of your ancestors in elementary school, plus one point. If not? Minus one.
If you believe in evolution, aren’t we ALL descendants of a black woman, and if that’s the case, no, I did not study my ancestors in elementary school, I studied White History.
-1
30/ If your parents or guardians attended college, plus one point. If not? Minus one.
My father attended college on the GI Bill, while my mother attended college while my dad was finishing up his career in the Air Force. She became a nurse so that when my dad retired and began his college career to get a teaching degree and subsequent Master’s, she worked as a nurse to help the family.
+1
31/ If you ever went on a family vacation, plus one point. If not? Minus one.
Always. Whether it was visiting family in Southern California, or taking a road trip to the Gulf Coast of Texas for a family reunion, or summers spent at Lake Tahoe, we took regular trips.
+1
32/ If you can buy new clothes or go out to dinner when you want to, plus one point. If not? Minus one.
We can, we do.
+1
33/ If you were ever offered a job because of your association with a friend or family member, plus one point. If not? Minus one.
I don’t think I ever tried for a job that was based on a friend or familial relationship.
-1
34/ If one of your parents were ever laid off or unemployed not by choice, minus one point. If not? Plus one.
Dad was in the Air Force and then was a teacher for many years, and then owned his own business.
Mom was a homemaker, then a nurse, and then a co-owner of a family business.
Neither was ever laid off or fired.
+1
35/ If you were ever uncomfortable about a joke or a statement you overheard related to your race, ethnicity, gender, appearance, or sexual orientation but felt unsafe to confront the situation, minus one point. If not? Plus one.
When I was younger I stayed silent if someone made an offensive joke or name-called, but not anymore, Not ever. Now I call it out whenever I see it or hear it.
But still, I was uncomfortable so .
-1

Total:
This quiz: +1
Total all quizzes: +6

Mistress Maddie said...

If you studied the culture or the history of your ancestors in elementary school -1.

If your parents or guardians attended college. a even break. Father had very nice education, but my mother never went to collage after high school.

If you ever went on a family vacation. +1

If you can buy new clothes or go out to dinner when you want to. +1

If you were ever offered a job because of your association with a friend or family member. Though not a friend or family member, I did once get a job that launched my visual background, because I had had a threesome with the guy who turned out to be the human resource manager and his partner, unbeknownst to each other at the time. When I walked in a week later and we saw each other, be just about said the visual boss would love me and slid my resume into her top pile. Two days later I got the call. I was there for the next 9 years before relocating to the Phiily area. So I guess +1.

If one of your parents were ever laid off or unemployed not by choice +1. Neither of my parents were in field where lay off are usually prevalent.

If you were ever uncomfortable about a joke or a statement you overheard related to your race, ethnicity, gender, appearance, or sexual orientation but felt unsafe to confront the situation. -1

I don't know what my final score is, but I know I had WAY MANY MORE + then -. And I know I have privilege. My mother has always said growing up an only child and not wanting for anything as a child, I turned out very giving and not a spoiled brat like many of her friends kids who were nightmares. And even though my father wasn't... and maybe not known of me being gay, I had a very good and accepting coming out, even though I was never really in the closet. I know I'm damn lucky to have had my bringing up and even more grateful that I was never ridiculed and picked on for being gay. Even though my high school was pretty with the times. Not sure why I never was, because one other kid did get picked on. I never take for granted anything I have, but truly enjoy each thing. I think I get it from my grandmother who came from nothing but ended up well. A Unsinkable Molly Brown if you will. I learned a lot from her about loving my environment and earthly delights, nature, and be happy with what you have not what I don't have. I try to be involved in many other things too, to help other when I can, gay groups and county voting... and the local ASPCA

whkattk said...

29. I'm a white boy, and that's ALL we ever studied in school. +1
30. Nope. Neither parent made it to college. -1
31. Never. Plus, the wife & I have taken exactly one vacation together in 35 years; I personally have taken one by myself. -1
32. OK - For the most part - if we're choosy about the menu prices, and shop at the discount stores. +1
33. -1
34. My father was laid off a number of times during my childhood. -1
35. Oh, I can do worse than being uncomfortable. How about attacked? Physically attacked. -1

That brings me to a total of +3 for the entire quiz. Not too shabby, I guess. Worse than some, better than most.

SickoRicko said...

I had no idea there was so much student/teacher shenanigans going on!

Mistress Maddie said...

Oh no!!!!!!!!!!! Tell me my comment disappeared?