Wonderland Burlesque's
Let's All Go To The Movies:
School Days Edition
(Oh, no... It's that little suck up, Jane Withers! She is such a drag! Let's ditch her after homeroom.)
High School Girl
"A page torn from the heart diary of a modern high school girl."
"Heedless youth speeding through life with the throttle wide open!"
"For broadminded adults only."
(Life in the fast lane, surely make you lose your mind...)
(Another version.)
"Behind these 'nice' school walls a teachers' nightmare! A teen-age jungle!"
(Wow, two pedophiles in one major motion picture about high schoolers! Bravo, Hollywood!)
High School Hellcats
"...what must a good girl say to 'belong'?"
"The facts about the taboo sororities that give them what they want."
(Are there sororities in high school? Must be a Hollywood thing.)
"Exposing the truth about the 'exclusive' private school, where money can buy everything... even murder!"
(And now... here's Conway Twitty!)
Diary Of A High School Bride
"It's not true what they say... we married for love!"
(Well, love and all those gifts. Ooo, a Hazel Atlas pressed glass snack set! All those disapproving looks are so worth it, darling!)
(Where life is one big pajama party intermittently interrupted by the occasional pregnancy scare!)
Reform School Girl
"A shocking true story of delinquent girls!"
(Didn't anybody every teach these girls to share the scissors? Where's Mrs. Garret when you need her?)
"They're learning fast!"
"The star pupils! Five swinging seniors who want to graduate with a bang!"
(The only thing they best learn fast is the number to the local Red Door clinic!)
"They were abducted and violated... but the worse was yet to come!"
(The worse was yet to come! They had to sit through this terrible, terrible movie and admit they were in it.)
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That's all we have time for this week.
Tune in next week!
Same time! Same channel!
Time To Get A Tasty Treat
6 comments:
We promise to satisfy your hunger. I think I had that on a tee shirt in high school.
And I did satisfy at least the same three friends and at least one of their fathers.
Films we never knew existed. Ahhh, the Hollywood publicists sure knew how to keep some things on the DL.
Maddie would've been perfect for this genre! Whatever happened to Ross Ford?
I had no idea, but I like the snack video.
Ohhh Mamie Van Doren?
And I love, love, love these posters! I'd put them up on my wall in a heartbeat.
XOXO
As someone who was once a high school girl I can tell you that my diary was pretty damn boring! Pages and pages of wondering if the flavor of the week boy looked "at me" or merely in my direction and what it could possibly mean. Nauseatingly boring I'm afraid. By the time the fun started I was way too busy to be writing about it! Besides, discretion is important when you decide to skip the pubescent boys and go straight for the older men.
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